You're Both Right!

(little girl): Mommy, why are you fat?
*plane bursts out laughing*.
(mom): You made me fat! But I love you anyway.
(little girl): No … I think just you ate lots of food.

Flight from LA to Seattle

Overheard by: Face

Posted on June 19, 2017
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Sylvan Learning Center Commercials Are Pretty Brutal in the U.K.

Flirty girl in club, to guy passing by: Hey, handsome, do you like stupid girls?
Guy, not stopping: No.
Flirty girl, looking crestfallen as he walks away: Oh…

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on June 14, 2017
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And I'm One Of the Few People Who Can Actually Make That Comparison

Director, yelling to actor onstage: Getting consistency out of you like is trying to pin a wet noodle on a wildcat's ass!

Central Pennsylvania

Posted on June 11, 2017
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As That Sign at Old Navy Clearly Indicated

Guy holding up green shirt: It's never too early to start thinking about what you're going to throw up on next St. Patrick's day.

Gap Outlet
Alexandria, Virginia

Posted on June 9, 2017
Clothes, Default, Drinking & drunks, Guys, Names, Stores, Virginia

No, But I'd Love a Stranger Telling Me How to Live My Life

Impossibly cheerful Australian: I'd like two scoops of coffee coffee coffee buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz, please!
Alarmed counter guy: Uh, do you need it?

Ben & Jerry's
Berkeley, California

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Posted on June 8, 2017
California, Default, Employees, Foreigners, Guys, Offers and requests, Questions, Restaurants, Weirdness

Didn't Help That I Was Using the Bible As Toilet Paper

Guy in pub to friends: It feels really wrong to be writing a text message to a minister of a church while on the toilet. I've just found this out.

York
England

Overheard by: Raptor

Posted on June 2, 2017
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Mark Penn Offered Us $2 Million for This Quote

Black girl to another black girl wearing Obama t-shirt: Girl, what is that on your shirt? Mmmm, Obama is looking all fine up on your chest.

UNC
Greensboro, North Carolina

Posted on May 29, 2017
Black people, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Compliments, Default, Girls, North Carolina, Politics

…Not That You're Mistaken

Small boy, looking out of train window: Look mummy! Look! All the fields are fucked!
Suddenly flustered posh mother: Caleb! The word is “flooded.” Flooded!

Train through the Shires
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on May 28, 2017
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And Did You Bring Enough for Everyone?

Professor at anatomy lecture to student touching her own throat: Ivanova, what are you gonna be touching when I'm lecturing on the sex organs?

http://anekdot.mail.ru/inner.html?rubric_id=2

Posted on May 27, 2017
Body parts, Default, Education, Other sites, Questions, Sex, Teachers

By Show Of Hands, Who'd Give Him the Money Without Hesitation?

Flamboyant black man to woman waiting at crosswalk: Oh, thank god for a sister! I need some money for the bus and I just know you'll help me out, little white barbie sister!

Saint Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Margie

Posted on May 22, 2017
Black people, Default, Family ties, Guys, Missouri, Money, Public transportation, Queers

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