So What If It Was During an Airport Body-Cavity Search?

Fag hag, about friend's boyfriend: Well, at least he has a nice guitar.
Fag: No one notices a guy's guitar on the first date…except maybe you.
Fag hag: Hey, at least someone fingered my g-string recently.

Jacksonville, Florida

Overheard by: Ari

Posted on July 6, 2015
Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Fag hags, Florida, Gays, Relationships, Sexuality

Dating MacGyver Scars You for Life

Chick to friend: Oh, yeah, this doesn’t look suspicious. A taco wrapped in a Dollar Tree bag, a baby, and a grill lighter.

16th Street Mall
Denver, Colorado

Posted on July 6, 2015
Colorado, Default, Fears, Feelings, Food, Friends, Girls, Malls

Or Between a Comfy Bed and a Public Bathroom

20-something foreigner: The Democrats and Republicans… It's like the difference between safe sex and unsafe sex.

Taverna
Athens
Greece

Overheard by: sarah

Posted on July 6, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Europe, Foreigners, Politics, Sex

And My Wallet Was Gone

20-something cute girl: So I know we had some kind of sex… because my ass hurt when I woke up this morning.

Santa Cruz, California

Posted on July 5, 2015
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I Recycled Your Sister Without Batting an Eye

Little girl: You don’t like me!
Mother: If I didn’t like you, I’d throw you in the dumpster.

North Branford, Connecticut

Posted on July 5, 2015
Compare and contrast, Connecticut, Default, Feelings, Girls, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Threats, Weirdness

That's Only 'Cause You Can't Hear Her

Annoying teen #1, looking at trashy magazine: She's cute.
Annoying teen #2: That's Jessica Simpson.
Annoying teen #1: Well, she looks good red-headed and with her mouth open.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Giggling quietly in the pharmacy sectino

Posted on July 5, 2015
About celebrities, Beauty, Default, Hair, Mouth, Pennsylvania, Teens

Weirdest Lecture on Photosynthesis Ever.

Professor: Statistics say that there is a strong correlation between being a black man and being a criminal. Now, that means that because of your skin color you may be more or less likely to go to jail. It certainly doesn't mean that if you go to jail, you'll come out a black man.

University of Maryland

Overheard by: Brittany

Posted on July 4, 2015
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And I'm Queequeg, the Tampooner!

Guy to friend: She's like menstruation incarnate.

Lassen National Park, California

Posted on July 4, 2015
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…Dies

(bunch of drunk teenagers walk out of a bar. Girl #1 bumps into a very drunk older man.).
Older man (in irish accent): Heeeey girls! How are yee tonight?
(pause).
Girl #1: Um, you're kind of old!!
(all of the girls start giggling. Older man looks extremely taken aback and confused at this information.).
Older man (baffled): What?!

Brussels

Overheard by: Gloria (among the group of girls)

Posted on July 4, 2015
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And He Prefers to Make Love, Not War.

Dude to chick: William Howard Taft. That's what I call my penis. Because he is large and in charge. And he got stuck in a bathtub.

High School Law Class
New York

Overheard by: Adrienne

Posted on July 4, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Names, New York, Penis, School [Elem., Middle, & High]

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