Canadian girl #1 to tour operator: Where can we do tours of Auschwitz?
Tour operator: Um, well, Auschwitz is in Poland, so…
Canadian girl #2: No, but we mean the one the Germans set up for the war. The German one.
Tour operator: Yes, I understand, but they set it up in Poland.
Canadian girl #1, after pause: Are you sure? We came to Berlin just to see it.
Berlin
Germany
Overheard by: Jit
Irate mother: No, you don't understand. I need to board that plane now!
Stewardess at gate: Ma'm, you cannot board now. There is no airplane at the end of the jetway. Look–no plane out there.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032304/i-bet-a-lot-of-people-dont-understand-that-woman.html
Overheard by: delayed flights always make me irrational too
Six-year-old girl: Are you doing your job?
Lifeguard: Are you drowning?
Six-year-old girl: No.
Lifeguard: Then I'm doing my job.
Kiddie Pool
Great Neck, New York
Guy behind deli counter: Does anyone need any help?
Old man #1: What about psychiatric help?
Old man #2: Are you giving or receiving?
Old man #1: I'm on the receiving end of everything. Except taxes!
Gene's Fine Foods
Saratoga, California
Cashier: Sir, would you like to donate that one cent to breast cancer research?
Man: No… I actually think cancer is a great way of controlling population.
Cashier, frowning at him: That's interesting.
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: anastasia
Woman: Do you have the book How to Fix Your Marriage without Words?
Saleslady: Sorry, it looks like we don't have that in stock right now.
Woman: Fuck!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Taylor
CPR class instructor: So when they sent the babies to us, they forgot to include the faces…
University of Miami, Florida
Overheard by: Zach
Weird lady getting her hair cut: The nail just wouldn't stay down on my toe. So because it was all loose, junk kept getting in there. The doctor basically told me that junk would just keep getting in there.
Stylist: Wow!
(a minute later)
Weird lady getting her hair cut: If I could have one of those guys do my wedding, I'd be all like, “here's a doily and a paper cup, see what you can do.”
Stylist: Yeah.
Weird lady getting her hair cut: I mean if you can't have a bangin wedding in Puerto Rico, you might as well see what you can get from a doily and a paper cup here.
Stylist: Yeah.
Supercuts
Pennsylvania
Pizza delivery guy, singing, with a handful of Froot Loops: Frooooooot loooooops!
Later, coming out of building: Everybody loves Froooooot Looooooooooops!
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: chromathegreat
Voice over loudspeaker: Attention members. Will Arthur Sarksian come to the front desk? We found your Speedos.
24 Hour Fitness
Glendale, California
Overheard by: James Jameson
