Tram driver to very black coworker: Have you been on vacation again? You've got a great tan going on!
Gothenburg
Sweden
Overheard by: Dan Sebastian
Tram driver to very black coworker: Have you been on vacation again? You've got a great tan going on!
Gothenburg
Sweden
Overheard by: Dan Sebastian
Announcement: There's a gray car parked outside, four feet into the street.
Older woman: It's mine. I don't park cars; I just sort of abandon them.
Portsmouth, Virginia
Woman: So, I want a small frozen turkey.
Meat guy: Okay, just right over here.
Woman: Ewww… What's wrong with this one?
Meat guy: Sorry?
Woman: Well, is something missing?
Meat guy: Um… No.
Woman: Well, what is this “grain fed” business??
Meat guy: Oh, that means it's fed with grains.
Woman: Oh! (picks up turkey and leaves)
Grocery Store
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Matt C
Crew member to friends: Oh, the gay cooks are nothing. I mean, yeah, they can have their feminine touches, but if you want real weird, you need Angela.
Friend: Angela? She sounds nice!
Crew member: She's head of security. She's two meters tall, and you need to take a step back before you can identify her as a woman.
Friend: Surely she's not that ugly?
Crew member: Oh look, there she is.
Friend: Oh my god!
Gent Jazz festival
Belgium
Intercom: The store will be closing in 15 minutes. Please bring your purchases to the front of the store to the check-out line. We hope you enjoyed your shopping experience. Thank you for shopping at K-Mart… Shit, I mean “Wal-Mart.”
Wal-Mart
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Caitlin
Macy's sales clerk: Now this cologne is $19.99 for the large bottle and comes with the free teddy bear.
Large woman spilling out of leopard-print tube top, sniffing: This is nice… It's real classy smelling.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: I don't discriminate; I hate everybody.
Crazy bag lady, loudly: I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy!
(sits down next to another passenger on the subway)
Crazy bag lady, now in passenger's face: I don't suck dick for pussy!
(female passenger gets up and moves)
Crazy bag lady: Why you jumping? Why you jumping, bitch!? You weren't jumpin' last night when that guy put his long ass dick in you last night!
Female passenger: Excuse me, ma'am, don't say that to me! You don't know me!
(subway train stops)
Conductor: City Hall station!
Female passenger: Excuse me, sir, there's a crazy lady on the subway harassing the other passengers.
Conductor: Oh, could you point her out to me?
(female passenger points to crazy woman yelling)
Conductor: Ma'am, are you bothering people?
Crazy bag lady: Why you tryin' to fuck me standing up!? Why don't you fuck me lying down like a gentleman!
Conductor: Ma'am, I'm calling the police.
Broad Street Line Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Administrator (mumbling to herself): Maybe I should just fire everyone here. (opens a drawer) Oh, here's my spoon. Okay, maybe everyone can keep their jobs.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/431193022/its-my-special-spoon.html
Overheard by: spoon.
Model scout, handing out card to hot tall teen: I know you're probably modeling already, but take my card anyway.
Shorter teen girl to friend, after scout has left: Fuck you. The only reason he gave you his card instead of me was because I'm eating a cookie. But it's the only thing I've had to eat today!
Starbucks
Studio City, California
Overheard by: Urz
Marine with no game to clearly uninterested sales clerk: And we marines say “semper fi” to each other, do you know what that means?
Sales girl: Yeah, it…
Marine, interrupting: It means “always faithful.” It's like Russian or some shit… No. Maybe Italian… Yeah, it's Italian.
Mall
Birmingham, Alabama
