Guy #1: Wow, you like them big.
Guy #2: No, I can do fingers. As long as it's a Chernobyl mate with, like, fifteen of them.
England
Overheard by: Noel
Guy #1: Wow, you like them big.
Guy #2: No, I can do fingers. As long as it's a Chernobyl mate with, like, fifteen of them.
England
Overheard by: Noel
Guy on mobile: Hi! I just wanted to clear up that whole breastfeeding thing…well, my boss has a one-and-a-half-year-old, and he said there were three stages: a sort of watery stage, then it moves into a semi-skimmed stage, then just pudding. Well, I just found out today and I thought you'd want to know too.
N21 Bus
London
England
Redhead to 30-something man: You like Jason Mraz. I like Jason Mraz. Therefore, we're not having an affair.
Line for Jason Mraz Concert
Hammersmith Apollo, London
England
Overheard by: Tom
Fat girl to thin girl pushing pram: Skinny men have skinny cocks.
England
Overheard by: Betsy
Teacher, to students: … And it’s not like he’s going to need that testicle…
Poole Grammar School
England
Chav, showing off in front of group of underage girls: Yes bruv, you don't even know, there was this duck, yeah, and I snapped its neck, innit! It was swimmin' around with its head loose making stupid noises!
Slightly older chav friend: Breds, you're talking shit, man. Number one, if you snapped a duck's neck it wouldn't still be swimming. B, I was there, remember, that fucking duck bit you on the hand, bruv and you screamed like a woman and ran away.
Cambridgeshire
England
Overheard by: Tim C
Girl on cell: … And he ate the whole ear.
Swan Walk Shopping Centre
Horsham
UK
Male lecturer to friend: Well: in my defense, it wasn't my dildo.
Lancaster University
England
Asian guy: If I had an uncle, I’d totally go to his house.
Derby
England
Overheard by: Me too.
