Family ties

Girl #1: Okay, so my sister was watching Pokemon the other day, and asked me a question about it, and I don't know what to tell her.
Girl #2: Well, what is it?
Girl #1: She was wondering, since there are no animals in the show, like cows or anything, if when they ate meat they were eating Pokemon.
Girl #2: Don't tell her the truth, it'll break her nerdy little heart.

Utah

Glamorous blonde mother, curiously: Did I pay you enough attention as a child?
Dark haired alternative daughter: Um…how do you mean?
Glamorous blonde mother: Did I not hug you enough?
Daughter: Why?
Glamorous blonde mother: Well, you're not…well…not very mainstream are you?
Daughter, in shock: Well, if there's anything wrong with me, it's your fault, isn't it!

Liverpool
England

Hot girl: I've spent so much on condoms since I got here that I think it would be cheaper to just have the damn kids by now.

Westwood, California

Woman: You should shop at Lane Bryant!
Girl: Mom, that's a fat girls store!
Woman: I shopped there when I was 17, and you're much fatter that I was!

Hendersonville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Tanner

Small boy with ice cream cone, trying to get mom's attention: I peed my pants! I peed my pants! Mommy, listen to me, I peed my pants!
Mom, deadpan: I bet that's real uncomfortable for you.
Dad to son: When we get home we are just gonna have to hose you down.
Son to dad: Oh yeah, make me lay on the yard and then spray the hose on me, and on my penis, and down my pants on my penis!
Boy's brother, from minivan: Ew! You can spell the pee!

Bucks County, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: free birth control

Little girl, waiting for a ride home from school: What is my mother doing that's more important than me?

Beverly Hills, California

Overheard by: Anon Y. Mouse

Chick: I was in your area during lunch and thought about asking you to meet me for a quickie.
Dude: What the fuck? And you didn't, because…?
Chick: I had to drive some coworkers back to the city. Wasn't sure what to do with them while we copulated.
Dude: Do what my parents did, sit them down in front of the tv, turn on Sesame Street and turn it up!

Conshohocken, Pennsylvania

Chick on cell: Did I tell you I sent my dominatrix pilot to my father and he writes back, “so how did you do the research? It's all very accurate.”

Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Amerigo Vespucci

Little boy: Mommy, if a turtle has no shell is it naked or homeless?
Mother: It would be dead, sweetheart.
Little boy: That's sad, mommy.
Mother: No, it isn't, dear. Come on, this is our stop.

Metro
Washington, DC

Young mother, in baby-talk: Aren't you excited to meet grandma and grandpa at the park? Do you think they're sad and lonely there waiting for us?
Toddler son: Noooo, they're drinking.
Mother, still in baby-talk: You think they're drinking?

St Charles Streetcar
New Orleans, Louisiana