Girl to friend: I really feel like I am in The Matrix right now.
Downtown Toronto
Canadia
Drama teacher to students: Okay, I want you all to close your eyes and imagine the most painful thing you can think of. Okay?
(a few moments pass)
Drama teacher: Okay, who wants to share? Dallin, how about you?
Dallin: Umm… Well, I imagined giving birth to a cactus baby.
Girl next to him: What is with you and cactus babies?
High School
Utah
Overheard by: Weskimo
Dude: And then we had to carry Elizabeth *three blocks* back to my place because she was too wide to fit in the car.
University of Arizona
Tucson, Arizona
Woman #1: So, all these women are going skydiving now, because you can have an orgasm against the updraft.
Woman #2 (enthusiastically): Oh, that's great!
Olympic Sculpture Garden
Seattle, Washington
Girl on cell: Not only did she steal my car, she ate the fucking cupcakes!
Southern Connecticut State University
New Haven, Connecticut
Middle-aged woman: My wedding ring from my first marriage has new meaning now.
Friend: What's that?
Middle-aged woman: When I lost all that weight and it didn't fit anymore, I took it as a sign to divorce the bastard and marry Jesus Christ.
Friend: Why don't you just wear it on your toe instead?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/455563429/that-doesnt-have-the-same-effect.html
Overheard by: good lord.
Chick #1: I worry that I'll become boring.
Chick #2: I think I'm more in danger of that than you.
Chick #1: What? You edit books about transvestite love!
Michigan
Overheard by: Meister E
Dorky girl: I think when the sugar is visible, that's a good sign.
Sarah Lawrence
Yonkers, New York
Young dude: Man, my jaw hurts.
Chick: Must have been all that sucking last night.
Young dude: Gotta be from something. Plus, I don't remember anything, so…
Quakertown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Ken
