Food

(odd club music plays in the background)
Student #1: Chef, what are we listening to?
Chef instructor: Just some flippy-trippy sausage making music! It's acid jazz.
Student #2, grinding variety meats: I'm so not on the right drugs for this.

Culinary School
Austin, Texas

Flea market lady: I don’t see the big deal about sanitation these days.
Older flea market lady: I know. The other day at work I dropped a cookie on the floor, then picked it up and ate it. You know, just to see what people would do.

Flea Market
Burley Park, Michigan

Overheard by: Amanda

Loud, livid woman barging through the crowd, completely serious: Move it! Get out of my way, I have to make pizza for Patrick Swayze!

Farmers Market
Culver City, California

Overheard by: Anon Y. Mouse

Guy #1: I love getting Lisa* Taco Bell.
Guy #2: Why’s that?
Guy #1: It’s gonna get her fat! I’m going to get extra sour cream and she’s going to be all like: “Damn, this is delicious!” Meanwhile, she’ll be getting fat.

Kangaroo
Gainesville, Florida

American guy: So, how do you like the states?
British guy: You know, I’ve yet to try a Twinkie.
American guy: Really?
British guy: Yeah, or a Ding Dong… Are those similar?

Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: twinkie lover

Professor: Society, chocolate pudding, and cars. All complex phenomena.

Oberlin, Ohio

Overheard by: secret Spy

Frustrated professor: I wanted to go back and eat my own flesh.

Portland, Oregon

Five-year-old to father: Yay! We're going to the bridge of pies!

Near “Bridge of Sighs”
Oxford
England

Homeless man approaching peach stand: Peaches, what’s they job? [Silence from passersby.] They job, what’s they job?
Befuddled white preppy #1: Well, I think they have potassium…
Homeless man: But what’s they job?
Befuddled white preppy #2: The color probably means they have beta carotene…
Homeless man: Peaches, what’s they job?

Farmer’s market, Union Square
New York, New York

Overheard by: I don’t know, either

Brunette on cell: Bacon may be a powerful motivator, but…

Public library
Appleton, Wisconsin