Female student: I came home last night and found my roommate sitting on the kitchen floor, crying and holding a bottle of Jägermeister and a recipe for homemade enchiladas.
Dumb friend: I didn't know you made enchiladas with Jägermeister.
University of Colorado, Boulder
Chick #1: She's on a date with a French guy.
(pause)
Chick #2: I bet French cock is like an eclair.
University of Denver, Colorado
Girl: Do we have any soda?
Guy: We have Pabst. It's pretty much the same.
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/04/give-that-man-blue-ribbon.html
Overheard by: sarafist
Hipster in “Vatican Chainsaw Massacre” t-shirt: And the thing is, dude, I just… (sighs) …I just don't really care about waffles, you know?
Queen Street West
Toronto
Canadia
Teenage daughter: I had some caffeine pretty late tonight, so I'm gonna take an extra 50 milligrams of Seroquel.
Mother: I'll be sure to call Mary-Kate if anything bad happens.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Girl: Yeah, I dipped his junk in pie.
Wesleyan Residence Hall
Illinois
Overheard by: Confused Resident
10-year-old boy to friend, about Austin Powers: Your mom let you watch that movie? She doesn't even let you have sugar!
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Teenage girl: Potato chips are like flakes of god's skin.
Rumson, New Jersey
Girl to friend: And he tried to order frozen yogurt, so I didn't sleep with him. If you want to bang me, you have to eat full-fat ice cream!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
