Gay Blockbuster employee: I hear the New England Patriots are going to make it to the Super Bowl this year.
Customer: Yeah, I hope. They're my favorite team.
Gay Blockbuster employee: Wait, New England… Are other countries allowed to play in the Super Bowl?
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Girl #1, talking about Lasik surgery: Well, they either cut your eye completely with a laser, or they do part of it surgically.
Girl #2: No! No! Stop. I can't talk about eyes. Don't talk about eyes, especially when I'm eating.
Guy: This is just like with my friend, Marise. We can't talk about killing people because she's from Haiti.
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Molly
Professor: The Swedes. They look at the glaciers, go inside, watch a Bergman film, have a heavy drink, then have some sex in the sauna, but ultimately that is unsatisfying, so they kill themselves.
Oberlin, Ohio
Overheard by: Secret Spy
Older woman: Susie's daughter adopted two little Guatemalites… Guatemalians?
Younger woman: Guatemalans.
Older woman: Yeah, you know, from Guatemalia.
Younger woman: Uhhhh…
Sacramento, California
Woman #1: I've always wanted to go to London.
Woman #2: I've never really wanted to fly overseas, but one place I would like to go is Venice.
Woman #1: Venice? Really?
Woman #2: Yeah. But I'd like to have a nice Italian man to go with me, like Antonio Banderas.
Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania
Foreign language professor on first day of class (in Russian): By the end of this year, I will have you singing like Russian whores!
University of Memphis
Memphis, Tennessee
Native American girl: Yeah, when I was in kindergarten, I was the only Mexican in class. Well, except for Reema. She's Lebanese.
High School
San Diego, California
Lady on loudspeaker: The train on platform 3 is going to Edgeware Road. The train on platform 4 is for Embankment Station. District Line services are not running between Embankment and Whitechapel. Platform 3 is for Edgeware Road, platform 4 is for Embankment. If you are still on this platform after these trains leave, you are lost and confused and need to find a member of staff.
Earl's Court Station
London
England
Stoner girl to stoner guy: Vietnam was a war, not a country!
Sacramento, California
Girl in uniform: So when I went to pick up my uniform there were no skirts. So my mom was like “My daughter needs bottoms.”
Friend: That sucks!
Girl in uniform: Yeah, the skirt I’m wearing now belongs to this girl who was deported to Trinidad.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Myr
