Girls

Teen girl: What a bitch! Like seriously, why can't I buy an iPhone cover for my BlackBerry?
Friend: I bet she was being racist.

Toronto
Canadia

Teenage girl to friends: They don't let the kids wear makeup at my sister's school! What if you're emo and you can't wear makeup? Then what?

National Ballet
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Girl #1, looking through clothes racks: We should spoon.
Girl #2: But then other people might wanna join in.
Girl #1: So?
Girl #2: It could get messy.
Girl #1: Oh, true.

New Zealand

Overheard by: Bianca

Dopey girl: I once figured out the secret of life.
Friend: Really? What?
Dopey girl: You see, that's the problem.
Friend: What do you mean?
Dopey girl: I forgot it.
Friend: Well, that sucks.
Dopey girl: Yeah. I would've made a lot of money off of that too.
Friend: Well, if it comes back to you…
Dopey girl: Oh–don't worry. You'll be the first to know.

Running Track
Loganville, Georgia

Girl #1: What kind of drugs were you on?
Girl #2: I wasn't on drugs!
Girl #1: What kind of drugs do you want to be on?
Girl #2: What kind of drugs do you have?
Girl #1: I have the morning after pill.
Girl #2: That's not a drug.
Girl #1: Yes it is, it kills babies.

Escondido, California

Daughter: It’s like… I didn’t see any Mexicans around for months, and then today, I’ve seen so many!
Father: Well, it got warm.

Cool Springs Mall
Franklin, Tennessee

Overheard by: Haha, what?

Paris Hilton lookalike waif on cell, wearing tight cargo Capris and giant white sunglasses: No, the steakhouse one… (pause) Yeah, when the vultures flew out of my pants!

Trailer Park behind PETCO
New Jersey

Overheard by: IDK if I want to understand this one

Blonde: There was a Ken doll encased in jello in the fridge.

Pocket Sandwich Theater
Dallas, Texas

Girl #1: And like, he gets me so drunk that when I get off I barf!
Girl #2: Wow!

Ottawa
Canadia

Overheard by: Chiz

Loud, stoned, drunk guy on train: Dude, I totally saw Melissa pee standing up before.
Loud, stoned, drunk girl: That is impossible! Seriously, that doesn't even make any sense! You'd get piss all over your leg!
Loud, stoned, drunk guy: No way, I saw her just take one leg out of her pants and prop it up against a tree, and it just shot down! She didn't get any anywhere!
Loud, stoned, drunk girl: Do you even understand female anatomy?! It doesn't work the same way as you! We can't do that! Melissa didn't do that!
Loud, stoned, drunk guy: Dude, if you can't pee standing up, then you've just got a bendy vag.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Wizzbiff