Woman to man: She fucked the lobster?
Cincinnati, Ohio
Creepy lurky guy at bar (walking up and smelling girl sitting at table): Sorry y'all. Just smells really good.
Friend of girl (giving guy a dirty look): That was awkward.
Creepy lurky guy: Well, maybe you shouldn't be here then.
Friend of girl: Well, maybe you shouldn't be trying to smell us.
Blue Martini
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Ariola
Mom: Can you sit there and be mommy's good boy just a little longer? We're almost done shopping.
Boy: No. I'm not your good boy. I'm not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh you aren't? Then will you be a big boy for me?
Boy: No, I'm not your big boy! I'm not your big boy, and I'm not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh really, then what are you?
Boy: I'm a grandma!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/08/read-too-much-shirley-maclaine.html
Overheard by: kari
Girl, after hugging friend: Um, why do you smell like a scrotum?
Guy: Wait, what?
Manhattan, New York
Guy: I think the reason I’m attracted to lesbians is their indifference to men.
http://overheardatstanford.blogspot.com/2006/05/girl-on-girl-action-not-factor.html
Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Short boy, yelling inches away from short girl's face: We should hang out!
Short girl: (walks away silently)
Tall boy, laughing: Dude!
High School
Eugene, Oregon
Queer #1: I can adjust to change, I think.
Queer #2: Yeah, but can your sphincter?
Leon High School
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: Deathly Confused
Guy going to study for finals: I’m kinda scared to sit in a cubicle alone… by myself… Alone with my thoughts. Not good.
PCL Library
University of Texas at Austin
