Drunk guy, walking into bathroom: Hey, you are at my pisser!
Sober guy at urinal: I didn't realize your name was “push to flush.”
Bar
Michigan
Overheard by: I wasn't looking
Drunk guy, walking into bathroom: Hey, you are at my pisser!
Sober guy at urinal: I didn't realize your name was “push to flush.”
Bar
Michigan
Overheard by: I wasn't looking
Guy on cell: Now I just need to get jumped.
Boston Common
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: not the best place to shout that out
Young woman shouting to older gentleman: Why can't Dr Molar do his own wife?
Olive Garden
Indianapolis, Indiana
Guy #1: So what I'm not clear on is how the penis and vagina work.
Guy #2: Well, how are you doing on STDs?
Guy #1: I'm still a little unsure about some, but I have syphilis down pat!
Finger Lakes Community College
New York
Mom to three-year-old son under the table: Whatcha’ doin’ under there, buddy?
Three-year-old son: Playing volleyball.
Dad: Volleyball? Smells like you’re pooping your pants.
Three-year-old son, giggling: I am.
Three-year-old son’s sister to friend: See, I told you it wasn’t the food.
Los Tres Amigos Mexican Restaurant
Michigan
Overheard by: Scott
Girl: You should meet his dad! He's like Don Quixote in a Kafka story.
Guy: Who's father they were talking about…you know…but with a tv.
Sabiá bar, Vila Madalena
Sao Paulo, Brazil
Guy lying on girl’s stomach: Your bellybutton is probably the worst thing I’ve smelled this week.
São Paulo
Brazil
Overheard by: what about last week?
Guy on cell: You know you're the only person who calls this number. You have to stop!
St. Catharines
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meg
20-something guy, about his sushi: This takes me back to when I used to live in Japan.
Brunette: When did you ever live there?
20-something guy: No, I mean in my past life.
Brunette: What makes you think you were Japanese?
20-something guy: Because ever since I was little I have always loved seafood.
Brunette: … Maybe you were a fish.
20-something guy: Not cool.
Sushi restaurant
Worcester, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Wallflower
Very pregnant woman: I don't want to have this baby. I don't want to have to work all of this weight off.
Man: I think I should keep you pregnant. This is the least worst you've ever looked.
Hasting's
Wichita Falls, Texas
Overheard by: mikeface
