For Some Reason, They Never Had Vanilla

Mr. Hon, hanging on car door: Hon! Tell mom here exactly where that swingers' club is, that I took you to on your birthday.
(wife says something unintelligible as she walks down path towards car)
Mom, sitting in car: Oh! That's where I used to buy ice cream when I was a little kid!

Public Pond
Kettering, Ohio

Posted on December 20, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Food, Guys, Memory lane, Moms, Offers and requests, Ohio, Sexuality

That's for Him to Decide

New dad: Look! These clothes are cute. Oh, look at this dress!
New mum: You have a boy, not a girl!

Department Store
Melbourne
Australia

Posted on December 20, 2020
Australia, Beauty, Clothes, Clothing, Dads, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Sexuality, Stores

So “Lehman” Is Out?

Big-haired mother to friends: I like what Sarah Palin did with her kids' names. I mean, I want to give my kids names that are cool, but nothing that would, you know, prevent them from being business majors.

San Antonio, Texas

Overheard by: An East Coast Elitist

Posted on December 16, 2020
Compare and contrast, Moms, Politics, Stupidity, Texas

But Here's a Coupon for a Complimentary Cavity Search

Irate mother: No, you don't understand. I need to board that plane now!
Stewardess at gate: Ma'm, you cannot board now. There is no airplane at the end of the jetway. Look–no plane out there.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032304/i-bet-a-lot-of-people-dont-understand-that-woman.html

Overheard by: delayed flights always make me irrational too

Posted on December 15, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Moms, Offers and requests, Overheard in Minneapolis, Public transportation, Women

Ma’am, You’ve Got Two All-Beef Patties There

Overeager mother: Sometimes when my boobies sweat, they smell like Big Macs.

McDonald’s
Madison, Indiana

Posted on December 10, 2020
Indiana, McDonald's, Moms, Rack

Doughnuts, at Least, Are Cheaper by the Dozen

Mother to daughter: And soon you'll be having babies…
Daughter's friend: I want a baby.
Daughter: What?!
Friend: Actually I want a doughnut, but no one was listening to me.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: and i want a pony

Posted on December 6, 2020
Canadia, Family, Food, Friends, Moms, Parenting, Pregnancy, Wishes

This Is Why I Divorced Your Father

Mother to child: You need to get up off the floor.
Kid: No!
(small dog approaches, starts licking kid's face)
(kid laughs as mother becomes even angrier, then dog begins humping kid)
Kid: Get him off me, get him off me!
Mother, calmly: See? This is what happens when you lie on the floor. This is why we can't lay down on the floor.

Portland, Maine

Posted on December 4, 2020
Advice, Animals, Kids, Maine, Moms, Parenting, Sex, Should have used a condom

Mrs. Nietzsche Was Tough on Little Friedrich

Biking mom to obviously struggling son: Why are you so weak?

http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/with_the_support_system_he_has.html

Overheard by: also struggling

Posted on December 1, 2020
Moms, Overheard in Minneapolis, Questions

We Thought We'd Give Him Something to Make Him Extra Hyper

Five-year-old boy to barista: I'm getting my pee-pee cut off tomorrow so I get a treat today!
Barista: Umm…
Mother to child: You are being circumcised, not mutilated! (to barista) It's just a medical thing, he doesn't really get it.

Starbucks
Carmel, Indiana

Posted on November 25, 2020
Baristas, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Health & Hygiene, Indiana, Kids, Moms, Penis, Restaurants

But I Don't Know Why the Caged Bird Sings!

Mother pushing stroller with three small boys at her side: Your brother asked you a question. Now answer it or stop talking!

Valley Fair
Shakopee, Minnesota

Posted on November 22, 2020
Default, Family ties, Kids, Minnesota, Moms, Offers and requests, Questions, Tourist attractions, Women

Moms