Professor, to newbie class: So…let's start with everyone telling me a secret about themselves so I can try and remember your names. You (pointing to student) start.
Student, tentatively: Ummm…I eat cold spaghetti in the morning?
Professor: Ewww! Fantastic.
University of Zurich
Switzerland
Overheard by: Stephanie
(group of teen girls on field trip)
Bored niece: Hey! Let's call my aunt in California. She's a psychic. (dials phone) Hi, we are bored and thought we'd call and ask you psychic questions.
Bored niece's friend: Ask her what my stage name would be if I became a stripper.
Lake Atlanta Park
Rogers, Arkansas
Overheard by: Yes, I have shoes and all of my teeth.
Cute girl to suit: What are you drinking?
Suit: Absolut on the rocks.
Cute girl: I prefer Belvedere.
Suit: Are you trying to get a free drink?
Cute girl to bartender: May I please have a Chopin Martini, up with olives? (points to suit, then turns back to him) Go fuck yourself. (walks away)
Hotel Bar
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: arrc
Six-year-old boy to brother: You know who'll save you? Abraham Lincoln. Too bad he's dead now. He'll rise from the dead! And raise chickens! His chicken powers can't save you now!
Baltimore, Maryland
Random guy: It's like I'm on the Pony Express or something…and I'm the pony!
Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Professor: Let's move on…let's talk about Puerto Ricans in New York. And crack. And race. Well, let's start with Obama.
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Overheard by: lovecollege
20-something girl to gay male friend: It really creeps me out when you call me “grandma” when we do drugs together.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: MuffinW
Girl: At first, I was really afraid he was cheating on me, but then I called him the next day and asked him where he was the night before…
Girl's friend: Well, where was he?
Girl: Oh, he was having drinks with John Lennon. I was freaking out for no reason!
New York
Tourist mom: What would Carol think of all this?
Seven-year old son: Her name is Coral, and I told you we broke up!
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