Pee

Man eating with his family: So when she took her home pregnancy test, she accidentally peed all over the counter. When he confronted her, she lied about it, and also told him she wasn't pregnant. But then my sister told him that she was actually pregnant.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/336519845/next-weeks-episode-of-as-the-world-turns.html

Overheard by: just trying to enjoy my meat scrambler

Teen girl #1: I wish a jellyfish would sting me so some handsome guy would run along the beach, whip out his dick and pee on me.
Teen girl #2: What?
Teen girl #1: To neutralize the sting, dumbass.
Teen girl #2: I know that. But still: what?

Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia

Girl to friend, while going to the bathroom: During that time of the month, I pee out of my butthole.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/426017235/naturally-4.html

Overheard by: weird, I normally just sneeze out of my eyes

Angry guy: No! We're going to go to the fucking pisser, and then we're going to leave!
(both start towards the bathroom).
Friend: Wait, I don't have to piss, why am I coming with you?
Angry guy: Fuck you, man!
Friend: Seriously, why do you fucking need my help?

Medford, Oregon

College girl: If anyone ever tried to tell me not to pee outside, I'd take it straight to the Supreme Court! I mean, I'm not gonna pee in someone's face or on a baby or anything, but if I wanna pee in a dumpster, then I will! (pause) Rosie O'Donnell would be with me on this. I don't know why, but she would.

East Lansing
Michigan

Overheard by: Everyone should have a cause…

Girlfriend to boyfriend: So should I stop peeing in front of you ?
Boyfriend to girlfriend: No, I don't mind. I don't care…just don't let me see you poop, that's just too fucking weird.

Michigan

Overheard by: da da

Man: You're going to need to empty your bladder.
Little girl (in squeaky high voice): I don't wanna empty my bladder!
Man (unashamedly loud): You'll need to empty your bladder before you get on the plane!
Little girl: Not fair!

St. Paul Airport
Minneapolis

Six-year-old: Piss piss pissy piss piss.
Unconcerned mother: Oh, look here’s the Crayola aisle!

Michael’s
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

T conductor, over loudspeaker: Sir! The world is not your toilet!

Park St. Station
Boston, Massachusetts

Guys on bench to kid on phone: No, we're not gonna pee on you, we're just gonna give you a shower!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania