Customer: Excuse me, where is your non-fiction section?
Salesgirl: What type of non-fiction are you looking for?
Customer: Harry Potter.
Bookstore
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Guy: Did you see his hickie? It's huge!
Girl: He has a hickie? But I thought he was gay!
Avenue of the Stars
Century City, California
Tour guide, showing statue of Athena to students: Does anybody know who that is?
Student: Abraham Lincoln.
Berkeley, California
Substitute teacher to class: I have a theory that everything in the world is derived from grilled cheese sandwiches.
Student: What about things made out of meat? You know, like animals and people?
Substitute teacher: That's where my theory ends.
High School, Missouri
Overheard by: can's wait to graduate
Queer #1: Is that pastrami? That was the best pastrami I’ve ever had.
Queer #2: Did you just ejaculate confetti?
Maryland and Euclid Avenue
St. Louis, Missouri
Camp counselor: Do you know if Bill has a Jack, offhand?
Camp Cory
Penn Yann, New York
Overheard by: i refuse to speculate
Ten-year-old girl to passing adult man: What's your name?
Mother, scolding: Do you have to hit on every man you see?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
