Student #1: Did you end up taking her to SeaWorld or Busch Gardens or something?
Student #2: Naw, man, I told you — she set all my clothes on fire!
Student #1: See, I think that’s kinky.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Student #1: Did you end up taking her to SeaWorld or Busch Gardens or something?
Student #2: Naw, man, I told you — she set all my clothes on fire!
Student #1: See, I think that’s kinky.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Shorter kid playing basketball to taller kid: Your dad bought your mom at Ikea!
Watertown, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Ariel
Female student #1: But, like, he’s a really good guy, and he’s going to make some girl very happy one day.
Female student #2: Right… But that girl’s just not you.
Female student #1: Exactly! But we might hang out this weekend and, like, have sex or something.
Female student #2: Nothin’ wrong with that.
Cornell University
Ithaca, New York
Sorority chick, from across room: Hey, do you wanna go steady?
Frat guy: Sure, when?
Sorority chick: I dunno… Let me ask my boyfriend and get back to you.
Frat guy: Sweet. Just as long as I get to tap that.
Iowa
Overheard by: confused and disgusted
Dude to friend: … And then she asked me, ‘Where do you think this relationship is going?’ Fuck! She calls me when she’s drunk, and I leave the door unlocked for her… This situation is working out well for me — that’s where this relationship is going.
Museum of Flight
Seattle, Washington
Girl to friend: And then this guy, I can't remember his name, he was like “hey, you want some cake?” But I've read his blog and he believes in creationism, so I was like “no, thanks.”
Christchurch
New Zealand
20-something guy: It's a good thing it didn't work out. She was poor.
Rock Climbing Gym
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: tangotravellers
Really stoned girl: Oh god, my first relationship was horrible. It was just six weeks of me being scared of his genitals.
Canberra
Australia
Overheard by: Boffins
Guy, singing: He'll only be your friend if he touches your breast…
Girl: What?!
Guy, not singing anymore: It's like my favorite song.
Metro State
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Squid
Dumb brunette #1: Well, he likes Sarah and Matt…
Dumb brunette #2: They don't count, everyone likes them!
Dumb brunette #1: Well, my boyfriend doesn't like any of my friends, then. I don't really like any of my friends.
Smart, older blonde walking by: Well, dear, there's a simple solution to that.
Dumb brunette #1: Oh? What is it?
University Library, Kent State
Kent, Ohio
