Vegetarian, pointing to pink thing on her plate: What animal is that?
Waitress: That's a pear.
Mt. Vernon, New York
Overheard by: Deek
Vegetarian, pointing to pink thing on her plate: What animal is that?
Waitress: That's a pear.
Mt. Vernon, New York
Overheard by: Deek
Old lady: Look at that cheese–such a pretty color! Like one of Hillary Clinton's pantsuits.
Santa Rita Cantina
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Katie
Impossibly cheerful Australian: I'd like two scoops of coffee coffee coffee buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz, please!
Alarmed counter guy: Uh, do you need it?
Ben & Jerry's
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Woman to friends: Who would have know that shaving my pubes wouldn't get rid of pubic lice?
Chipotle
Towson, Maryland
Tattooed guy: I once tried to smoke Aloe vera.
Taste of India
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Customer pointing to guacamole: Can you put some of that Guatemala on it?
Chipotle
Washington, DC
Teen to friend: My house smells like bug spray, and there is blood all over my bed!
Pappadeauxs Restaurant
Houston, Texas
Waiter: … Chicken nachos all on her butt cheeks!
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Nic
Sorority girl to another, sitting in booth: Girl, I was double-fisted all night long last night!
Gay dude #1, quite loudly, to gay dude #2: Oh my god! That is so nasty! Who on earth would ever say something like that out in public! I wouldn't want anyone to know that anyone could do anything like that to me, let alone enjoy it! Nasty bitches!
Gay dude #2 to gay dude #1, very quietly: Um, I think she meant she had a drink in both hands, you idiot.
Gay dude #1: Oh.
Chinese Restaurant
Lexington, Kentucky
Overheard by: j-we
Obnoxious 20-something chick: We went to a Yankees game and had the worst seats ever. We didn’t even see Derek Jeter’s ass! … Or anyone’s ass.
IHOP
Green Bay, Wisconsin
