Sensory experiences

You're Too Kind, Madame

Little girl, in Arabic, as she sits in the train: Smells like cotton candy!
Mother, in French: Yeah, you're right, it smells like cotton candy. (to grandmother) Don't you think it smells like cotton candy?
Young black woman, sitting in the next row, smiling: It's me. It's my perfume.
Mother: Really?! What is it?
Young black woman: Vanilla and cotton candy.
Mother: Really? My girl told me it smells like the amusement park. At first I thought it was the cleaning product they used to wash the train floor. (pause) It smells really good.

C Train
Paris
France

Overheard by: BBM Tm

Your Editors Are Happy to Help a Complete Stranger Have a Trauma

Young woman #1: So we just left her in there with the stallions for like four hours. She still doesn't know anything about it.
Young woman #2: Oh my gosh, you never told her? I'm going to tell her next time I see her.
Young woman #1: No, don't tell her! She doesn't drink, so she'd just be like, “waaahhh, what did you guys do to me?”
Young woman #2: Oh, right.

Upstate New York

One Unhealthy Appetite at a Time

Dude #1: This street smells like greasy food and whores!
Dude #2: I could go for some greasy food right now.

East Lansing, Michigan

Overheard by: MF

Obesity: Explained.

Little boy, pointing to a box of cereal: What's this?
Mom: Cocoa Krispies. It's chocolate-flavored Rice Krispies.
Little boy: Oh my god!

Stop & Shop
Mamaroneck, New York

Overheard by: Diana

Guess Who's Had a Little Too Much Caffeine?

Guy: I'm not exactly awake yet. Hence the espresso. (holds up cup)
Girl: Oh, you should pour it all over yourself!
Guy: I think that would be contrary to waking up.
Girl: No, no. You'd absorb the caffeine into your skin, and you'd become Awake Man! And your arch-nemesis would be the Sandman, and… and… stuff.

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

The Winter Olympics: Explained

Man in expensive dark suit #1, with grave look on his face: It was toasted. I should never have got it toasted. Now it's all… Cold, and crunchy. (in tone of intense disgust) Toasted.
Man in expensive dark suit #2, looking even more serious than the first: Toasted… You should know better. Never get it toasted if you're saving it.

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

He Gives the Same Answer to “Is the Bathroom Clean?”

Customer: Is this a cheese danish?
Hipster barista: It's lemon creme…kind of cheesy, I guess.
Customer: Is it good?
Hipster barista: Kind of… It's subjective.

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

You Always Give Your Pets Such Unique Names!

Teen girl on cell: Yes, well, there's excitement, plateau, orgasm… and I forget the last one.

99 Bus
Vancouver
Canadia

Lousy Human Condition

Cute girl #1: Do you ever wake up and just smell really bad for some reason?
Cute girl #2, without hesitation: Yeah!

Tufts University
Medford, Massachusetts

Overheard by: concerned about sanitation

Whomever It Is, Thank You!

Drunk sorostitute to group of friends: I'm getting boned in the butt! Who's boning me in the butt?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/378479688/know-your-alcohol-limit.html

Overheard by: pob

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