Professor: There’s nothing sexual about this map… For me, at least.
Kansas State University
Manhattan, Kansas
Overheard by: Nicole
Teen girl #1: Oh my god! Really? Well, even though you’re three weeks late, you totally don’t have to worry until a month after you guys actually did it. So you’ve definitely got at least a week left until you need to start worrying.
Teen girl #2: … Really?
Teen girl #1: Yes, I’m completely sure. You’re totally fine. Golden. Except that you’re 17 and might be pregnant.
Dallas Airport
Dallas, Texas
Fruit fly: Does he like me?! I think he might, but if he doesn’t… He has to know that I like him! Or am I being too obvious?
Queer friend: Ugh! Heterosexual relationships make me queasy!
Montreal
Canadia
Guy #1: What if Heather was a guy?
Guy #2: If Heather was a guy, then I’d be gay.
Guy #3: If I was a guy, then I’d be gay!
Guy #1: … Wait, what?
Cupertino High School
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Guy #1: Sometimes I pretend I’m gay to get chicks at parties.
Guy #2: Does that really work?
Guy #1: Nah… I mean, it’s worked once, but I’m not sure she was a she.
Guy #2: Sweet! I’ve gotta try that!
Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Regular
Girl on cell, pushing cart: Well, yeah, but lots of people have mean mothers-in-law.. I don’t think yours is mean just because she has a mullet… Well, we know she wasn’t a lesbian at least four times, or you wouldn’t have a baby-daddy.
Target, Sports Arena Boulevard
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Seriously?
Guy: No, Derek* is definitely gay.
Girl #1: No, he’s not! He has naked pictures of girls all over his walls and MySpace and everything.
Girl #2: So? You know he only has those because he likes to paint chickens on them!
Seattle, Washington
College guy: So, are you still a maybe-lesbian?
College girl, shrugging: I like penis much better. Chicks are crazy, but if one licks me, I’m not gonna complain if they’re hot.
University of Kentucky
Lexington, Kentucky
Six-year-old boy: Look, Dad! I got a sticker.
Dad: That’s a butterfly sticker, which is a girl sticker. You can’t have that.
Six-year-old boy: Okay, Dad. What do you want me to do with it?
Dad: Give it to me.
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Katelyn the sticker collector
