Little girl: Mommy, can I have a bubble bath?
Mother: No, it makes your vagina hurt.

Plantation, Florida

Overheard by: i guess that's a valid reason.

Dude: Hey, man, do I have any more swastikas on my face? I tried to wash them all off…

Overheard by: zak

Greenpeace activist to couple walking out of grocery store: Are you guys concerned about our environment?
Elderly couple: Definitely! We recycle, and we take showers together!

Mothers Market
Costa Mesa, California

Overheard by: arie

Drunk man: I may not have a home, but I'm not like homeless homeless…I take showers and usually smell good.
Drunk woman: And what does this have to do with blowjobs?

Orange County, California

Overheard by: Katie

Lady to another: I can’t believe it! He’s actually getting married! I mean, now he’ll have to do normal things like eat and bathe.

Dude: You fail to see that the rhinoceros is not pleased that you've clogged the bathtub drain with jam and celery. She's quite angry with you. I mean, if you just shit out a canary, it's not going to want to play tonsil hockey.
Friend: How hard would it be to get you involuntarily committed to a mental institution?

Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York

Overheard by: Russ

Chick in stall, after biochemistry exam: Thank god that’s over. Now I can finally take a shower.

Overheard by: a [clean] student

Guy: So Stacy comes in and finds me screaming in the shower.
Friend: Wow!
Guy: Yeah, there are some places you should just never touch after cutting Habanero peppers.

Men's Room
Garrison, New York

Overheard by: mark

Teenage girl to friend: Anyway, I think he likes me… He gave me a sponge bath last night.


Overheard by: Ineke

20-something chick on cell: Hello? Seriously? It smelled like your balls last time you used it! (pause) Okay, I guess, make sure you rinse out that motherfucker! You too, bye.
Friend: What was that about?
20-something chick: My boyfriend wants to use my shower, and my loofah.
Friend: Oh.

San Antonio, Texas