Girlfriend: I have a great idea for an alternative energy source!
Frustrated boyfriend: You’d better not say ‘the sun’…
Girlfriend, after a pause: Oh…
UC Davis
California
Overheard by: student on the bus
Girlfriend: I have a great idea for an alternative energy source!
Frustrated boyfriend: You’d better not say ‘the sun’…
Girlfriend, after a pause: Oh…
UC Davis
California
Overheard by: student on the bus
Guy on cell: Yeah, so I was seeing this girl, and she called me and said, “so I think I might be pregnant,” and I said “oh shit, really?” and then she just said, “yeah, but if I am I'll just put that fucker up for adoption.”
Escondido, California
Grungy young man, after loudly prattling on about drinking 12 Smirnoffs a day, weed, and massage therapy: I didn't believe in the inner-spiritual plane until I saw my unborn child's soul whisked away.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Anon Y. Mouse
Guy: I just want to know how big his nipples are!
Revolution Cafe
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: crafty biotech
Group of little girls to window poster: Hannah Montana! Hannah Montana! Hannah Montana!
Exasperated father: Don’t kiss that!
Mall
San Diego, California
Man #1: She’s lost a lot of weight recently.
Man #2: I guess. Didn’t help, though.
Man #1: With what?
Man #2: The pure funk which likely seeps from her gaping maw of an over-used pussy. I wouldn’t fuck that with your dick, dude.
Man #1: Thanks for having my back. Do me another favor — fuck your wife with my dick, okay?
Man #2: Why not? Someone’s dick should be allowed to.
9th and J Streets
Sacramento, California
Very serious little boy: I just love the grocery store bathroom.
Confused mom: Why? What’s so great about it?
Little boy, wistfully: It’s just so peaceful…
Kaiser
Saratoga, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Guy to friend: My hot sauce packet is talking dirty to me.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Josh
Suit on cell: Oh, did I tell you I met someone? (pause) Her name is Brian.
Civic Center Farmer's Market
San Francisco, California
Clueless girl: My computer has a virus.
Computer geek: You need an external hard drive to transfer the files you want to keep.
Clueless girl: Can't I just transfer it to another computer?
Computer geek: No, the virus will spread.
Clueless girl: (blank stare)
Computer geek: Its like fucking someone with AIDS.
Los Angeles, California
