Wife: Honey, be nice…
Husband: No, I refuse to be nice. It’s against my religion.
Wife: Oh, sure, you should get your own title… Archbishop of Jackass.
Home Depot
Rancho Cucamonga, California
Wife: Honey, be nice…
Husband: No, I refuse to be nice. It’s against my religion.
Wife: Oh, sure, you should get your own title… Archbishop of Jackass.
Home Depot
Rancho Cucamonga, California
20-something girl on cell: I'm sunburnt, drunk, and Asian, so why not? Why not?
The Wildcat Lounge
Santa Barbara, California
Chick #1: She doesn’t even *want* to get married!
Chick #2: And she’s not a ho?
Starbucks, Pacific Center
Daly City, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Girl: Do you know how much inflow comes from the Colorado River?
Professor: Ummmm…yeah. I do, actually. (doesn't answer question).
UC Berkeley
California
Overheard by: not telling either
Girl Scout: Hey, you wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies? I’m gay!
Safeway
Gilroy, California
Student #1: Who’s that bald guy?
Student #2: That stupid-ass bitch that I want to kill.
Student #1, nonchalant: Oh.
41 West Santa Clara Street
Arcadia, California
Overheard by: Argonath
Mexican girl: I feel sorry for white people. They’re not allowed to use stereotypes.
San José State University
San José, California
Overheard by: Cracker
Chick #1: Oh my god, I was so drunk last night! Do you think Lisa will get mad that I made out with her boyfriend?
Chick #2: Yes.
Chick #1: Well, it wasn’t really my fault.
Chick #2: Yes, it was. You basically went up to him, batted your eyelashes, and started making out.
Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Laura
Young boy: Dad, what does this say?
Father: What do you think it says? It says, ‘Irish.’
Young boy: What’s that?
Father: Irish are little, short people.
Thousand Oaks, California
Young black man: That’s the best gift you can give a brother — a fine Latina with B cups.
Orange Line bus
San Fernando Valley, California
Overheard by: suzy vapid
