The Real Secret Behind Jared's Weight Loss.

Girl #1: I haven't kissed him in over a week because he has mono. But a couple days ago we went out to Subway, and then to my house to eat it and watch a movie. Well, he went home and I saw what I thought was my Subway cup, so I took a big swig out of it.
Girl #2: Oh, no!
Girl #1: Yeah, and I said “screw it!” and I just decided to make out with him, since I missed it so much. But I've been feeling a little crappy lately.
Girl #2: (stares)
Girl #1, thoughtfully: I hope I'm not getting sick. (pause) Oh, this shirt is cute!

UCCS
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: Dazeys

Posted on July 9, 2009
Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Colorado, Food, Girls, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Maladies, Movies, Sex, Stupidity, Wishes

He Keeps Telling Us He's Not Straight.

Woman on cell: Take him home in a straitjacket, or take him to the psych ward in a straitjacket…either way, he's not going to be happy.

Saratoga, California

Overheard by: Coffee shoppe caffeine junky

Posted on July 1, 2009
Advice, California, Clothes, Happiness, Mental illnesses, On the phone, Weirdness, Women

…After What Happened Last Time?

Sober sorostitute with heavy smoker's voice: Like o-m-g, I just decided on my Halloween costume!
Drunk sorostitute, stamping feet: Oh my god! What?! What what what?
Sober sorostitute: Wait for it…wait for it… Little ho peep!
Drunk sorostitute: Can we have sex with the little ho sheep?

Duke University
Durham, North Carolina

Overheard by: Disgusted

Posted on June 30, 2009
Animals, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, North Carolina, Questions, Sex, Sorority types, Weirdness

It's Rare to Find a Young Man Who Thinks That Far Ahead

Five-year-old boy: Hey, I got an idea! Let's get naked!
Visiting adult friend: Yeah? And then what?
Five-year-old boy: We'll sit in the street!

Mason, Ohio

Overheard by: Rachel

Posted on June 16, 2009
Clothes, Default, Friends, Guys, Kids, Ohio, Questions

It Didn't Start Out As a Skirt

Loud high school chick in back of the bus: Remember when Amanda was wearing that skirt and she farted? It sounded like she dropped a fucking bomb! Wheeee-boom! Everyone applauded, it was that fucking cool.

Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: bitingontinfoil

Posted on June 15, 2009
Burping & farting, Canadia, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Memory lane, Students

I Think You Need to Be Only in Your Panties to Fully Appreciate This Quote

Punk girl: For some reason, everything you do makes sense when you're in only your panties.
Purple-haired girl: I know, right? It makes sense to me too!
Tall greaser guy: In fact, it wouldn't make sense if you weren't only in your panties.

Bakersfield, California