Colleges & Universities

Sociology professor: The world is fundamentally the same as 100 years or so. Fathers back then were worried about their daughters listening to the radio. Now, they worry about them “sexting” on their BlackBerrys!

University of Delaware

Overheard by: Who is sexting?

Furry man to girlfriend, loudly: So does your sister, like, *never* shave her legs?

Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey

Professor: How do you feel about presenting?
Student: Nervous. I don't like talking in front of people.
Professor: These aren't people, these are students!
Students: (silence)
Professor: That's not a nice thing to say. You can't believe I just said that, can you?

UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Overheard by: CR

Girl to friends: Of course guys are better at math and science than girls are, they have more time to work on it!

Dining Hall, Harvard University
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: what?

Nursing student #1, about absent classmate: If she'd have kept her fucking mouth shut and not been a motherfucking snitch we wouldn't be in this mess!
Nursing student #2: Why'd she snitch on us?
Nursing student #1: I don't know, but she think she the best thing since apple sauce!
(long pause)
Nursing student #1: I really like applesauce!

Marian College
Indianapolis, Indiana

Prospective student's mother: I hear there are a lot of lesbians on this campus.
Student tour guide: Well, it isn't like they jump out of the bushes and convert you or anything.

College, Colorado

Male student in campus center: So once you put on the wetsuit, you pee all over yourself. Then you're warm for the whole time!

Princeton University
New Jersey

Overheard by: excuse me?

Professor to unmoving grad students: That's a fire alarm…pay no attention.

Princeton University
Princeton, New Jersey

Ditzy female student #1: How cute is it that she can bend all the way over with her elbows on the floor?
Ditzy female student #2: I know! Do you think she'll teach us how to do it?
Ditzy female student #1: Yeah! And then we can get someone to take a photo!

Murdoch University
Perth
Australia

Guy #1: You walked back to your house naked last night?
Guy #2: Yeah, but I was wearing socks.

Arizona State University

Overheard by: Jayne