I Just Thought It Would Be a Lot Bigger, Is All.

Little girl in stall with dad: You're silly! This is silly!
Dad, peeing: Nothing is silly in here.
Girl: That's silly. This is silly. Stop.

Men's Bathroom
Hendersonville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Tanner

Posted on June 14, 2009
Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Girls, Guys, Kids, Offers and requests, Restroom, Tennessee, Words

And I'll Film It for YouTube.

Dad to little girl sitting on railing, watching sea lions: You fall down, that's it. If you fall down, I'm not helping you. (pause) And the sea lion's gonna eat you.

Pier 39
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Paulo

Posted on June 10, 2009
Animals, California, Dads, Default, Guys, Kids, Threats

This One Used to Be Magic, Until the Bookie Broke It

Dad balancing bird toy on middle finger, to seven-year-old son: This is dad's magic finger. He uses it when driving.

http://community.livejournal.com/overheardinmelb/223374.html

Posted on June 8, 2009
Body parts, Dads, Default, Family ties, Guys, Magic, Overheard in Melbourne's Journal

Jerry Springer Expands to Foreign Markets.

Mother to teen son: Your hair needs a cut.
Teen son: Your face needs a cut.
Dad: Your face needs a punch!

Ebdentown
New Zealand

Overheard by: Schmitty

Posted on June 8, 2009
Body parts, Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Family, Guys, Hair, Moms, New Zealand, Offers and requests, Teens, Violence

Nothing Says Spring Like the Scent Of Ice Cream and Urine

Small boy with ice cream cone, trying to get mom's attention: I peed my pants! I peed my pants! Mommy, listen to me, I peed my pants!
Mom, deadpan: I bet that's real uncomfortable for you.
Dad to son: When we get home we are just gonna have to hose you down.
Son to dad: Oh yeah, make me lay on the yard and then spray the hose on me, and on my penis, and down my pants on my penis!
Boy's brother, from minivan: Ew! You can spell the pee!

Bucks County, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: free birth control

Posted on May 28, 2009
Clothes, Dads, Default, Family, Family ties, Guys, Kids, Moms, Pee, Penis, Pennsylvania, Women

You've Been Spending Too Much Time with Raspy Aunt Selma

Three-year-old: Pick me up some cigarettes! I need a smoke!
Dad: What did you just say!?

Kansas

Posted on May 5, 2009
Dads, Default, Guys, Kansas, Kids, Offers and requests, Questions, Smoking

Who's Daddy's Little Hell Spawn?

Man to small daughter: Do you know why they cut the elephants' tusks off? It's so they won't poke or hurt anybody. (pause) Just like we cut your fangs off when you were young.

St. Louis Zoo
St. Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Katie

Posted on April 29, 2009
Animals, Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Guys, Missouri, Questions

Moving on to the Case Of Muffet V. Spider…

Father to son in stroller: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall; Humpty Dumpty had a great fall; Humpty Dumpty hired a great lawyer; Humpty Dumpty sued the pants of the wall maker.

K Street
Washington, DC