Small child #1: Hey, daddy, can we go get some ice cream?!
Small child #2: Yeah, daddy, let's have ice cream!
Father: Uh, no. But you can have yogurt drinks. They're basically the same!
Small children: Yay!
West Edmonton Mall
Canadia
Overheard by: Dr. Ruth
Teenage girl #1: Oh god, I want to fuck him so badly.
Teenage girl #2: Oh my god, you whore! You don't fuck him! You make sweet, sweet love to him.
Summit, New Jersey
Girl #1: Do you remember that chick we saw that time?
Girl #2: The one at that place?
Girl #1: Yeah, wait, no, that other place.
Girl #2: Yeah. What a whore.
Girl #1: I know, right?
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: not that chick
Sweet old lady: I'm a pretty wild gardener.
Bellingham, Washington
Guy on cell: I know of at least two plant and four fish species that could do my job just as well… Now, the fish just came in with touchscreen technology.
Covington, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jesus Freak
Young black hipster guy to group of hipster friends: So I saw these fat gay guys, and I was like “What the fuck?! Fat guys can't be gay!”
BPCC
Bossier City, Louisiana
Overheard by: Oh really?
Man #1: How’s your wife?
Man #2: How should I know?
Man #1: What do you mean: “How should I know?”? She’s your wife! Don’t you talk to her?
Man #2: Not since she got the restraining order on me.
Huxley, Iowa
Overheard by: Hondo
Mom: Do you want to take your coat off?
Toddler: Go to hell!
Wal-Mart
Hendersonville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Tanner
Blonde on cell: We got a nice hotel room for our cat.
Montgomery and California
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Girl on cell: I think the relationship really started going downhill when he took Western Australia from me.
Seattle, Washington
