Jesus: How the Fuck Did That Rumor Get Started?

Girl #1: So, what’s your idea of the perfect guy?
Girl #2: Oh, I know what she’ll say! Jesus.
Girl #3, blushing: She’s right.
Girl #1, rolling eyes: Ugh! But you can’t go down on Jesus… can you?

Franklin, North Carolina

Overheard by: J-Bake-Oh

Posted on October 18, 2025
BJs, Default, Girls, Jesus, North Carolina, Questions

Clearly You’ve Never Had Velveeta Mac N’ Cheese

Professor: So, do you guys think fornication is man’s greatest pleasure?
First year Humanities class: [Embarrassed silence.]Brave student: Um… I don’t know about greatest… I mean, I like to eat.
Professor, slamming hands down on desk: I’ve been eating for 62 years, and I’ve never gotten an orgasm from it!

Richmond, Indiana

Posted on October 17, 2025
Default, Indiana, Orgasm, Questions, Sex, Students, Teachers

The Plumber Says You Can Have It If You Want It

Girl on phone: Hey, honey, good news — I can get you your hair back.

Fortitude Valley
Brisbane
Australia

Posted on October 17, 2025
Australia, Default, Girls, Hair, On the phone

Possibly because I Spend Every Night Discussing Pee Stamina with You

Guy #1: It doesn’t matter if you can pee longer than I can, because I can still drink more than you, so I win overall.
Guy #2: No, peeing longer means I can have sex longer than you.
Guy #1: … Dude, you’re a virgin.

Restroom, Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: What the…

Posted on October 16, 2025
Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Guys, Massachusetts, Virginity

Portrait of a Man Who’s Had a Close Call

Man to date: You know what, I like you so much I’d get HIV tested for you.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Kara

Posted on October 16, 2025
Compliments, Default, Guys, Illinois, STDs

But You’ve Also Said That about Mailmen, the FBI, Shepherds, and Priests

Woman to crying toddler: Now, stop it, or that policeman over there will come and take you away!
Man: That’s right.
Woman: That’s what policemen do. They take little boys away.
Man: That’s right.

Outside the John Hancock Center
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: passerby-ing