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Receptionist to executive assistant: …so in conclusion, I got peed on…by a taxi driver…who I dated.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/316536671/and-it-didnt-work-out.html

Overheard by: Ian

Guy, about his job: Right now, we are working on a line where you can make a customized branded dildo to fit your needs.
Woman who just told everyone she is pregnant: That's fantastic!

City Vino Restaurant
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: entertained witness

White hipster lesbian to another: I hate Africa-gasms.

Ann Arbor, Michigan

Creepy lurky guy at bar (walking up and smelling girl sitting at table): Sorry y'all. Just smells really good.
Friend of girl (giving guy a dirty look): That was awkward.
Creepy lurky guy: Well, maybe you shouldn't be here then.
Friend of girl: Well, maybe you shouldn't be trying to smell us.

Blue Martini
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Ariola

Guy on cell: Yeah, she kept on shouting out stuff in German. I didn't know if that meant she was about to come or if I was fucking her wrong.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Jackie O. lookalike: If I can’t sneak cigarettes into my house, what makes you think I can get an ax?

Starfest Sci-fi Convention
Denver, Colorado

Upset 20-something girl: I don't like things where things are things inside of things!

Drexel University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Zywiec

Girl to friend: I can’t believe I fell asleep next to your vagina. I woke up and my face was next to your brick wall. [Kisses friend.] I love your brick wall.

Caribou Coffee
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Bardley

Mom: Can you sit there and be mommy's good boy just a little longer? We're almost done shopping.
Boy: No. I'm not your good boy. I'm not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh you aren't? Then will you be a big boy for me?
Boy: No, I'm not your big boy! I'm not your big boy, and I'm not your good boy anymore.
Mom: Oh really, then what are you?
Boy: I'm a grandma!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/08/read-too-much-shirley-maclaine.html

Overheard by: kari

Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.

Michigan State University
Michigan

Overheard by: sjshock