Professor: Now, if we did eliminate illness and achieved immortality there might be serious religious repercussions. Can anyone think of how this might affect religious beliefs?
Bimbette: Well, like, if Hitler were immortal, he would, like, go to jail for, like, a million years and then, like, chill out for eternity, you know?
Eternal Youth and Immortality Seminar
Lafayette College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: knows that Hitler would still be dead because he SHOT himself
Teacher: If I say “I put pants on today,” it's very different than if I say “Perhaps I put pants on today.”
High School
Falls Church, Virginia
Overheard by: amused student….
Professor: Fluorine is to chlorine as chlorine is to Kool-Aid. If you inhale chlorine, it burns your nose–you inhale fluorine and it'll eat your face and look for your family.
San Diego State University
San Diego, California
First grade teacher to colleague, in front of first graders: And so I walked into the living room and he was there, naked, standing on the coffee table.
Portland, Maine
Professor, in regards to nationalism in film: Now what makes a film “British”?
Valedictorian: They all speak British?
University of Texas
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Adam
Social problems teacher: So what are some social problems that affect us today?
Female student: Murder?
Teacher: Yeah, that’s good. [writes it on the white board.] Any others?
Male student: Narcissism?
Teacher: I don’t quite understand…
Male student: Well if people are falling asleep all the time and they don’t know it…
Grand Rapids Community College
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Kid: Woah, you just blew my mind!
Teacher: That's not all I'll blow.
High School
Pennsylvania
Student: She thinks she’s so good. She was probably the only soprano in her high school, so she was automatically the best. Or maybe she went to a school for like, people with severe burns. She was the best in the burn victim ward.
Westminster Choir College
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Gaby Young
