Cute girl #1: Hey, I want you to meet one of my best guy friends.
Cute girl #2 to male friend: Hey, nice to meet ya.
Male friend holding lighter, totally ignoring others: I can make fire! (shouting) I'm a goddamn wizard!
Johnson City, Tennessee
Overheard by: kiwi
Really skinny sorority girl: I paid my rent and then I spent the rest, $700, on this new Louis Vuitton (squeals and hugs the purse). But now I have 30 bucks to last a whole month. Looks like I'll be dating for dinner or eating crackers.
Sorority friend: You spent twice as much on your bag as you did your rent! At least you paid your rent on time! Don't worry, you'll find dates. That purse is totally worth it!
Really skinny sorority girl: I know, right, I should just live in my purse. I think that is why married women get fat: they can finally afford to eat. You know my ass is getting fat when I get married.
IHOP
Dallas, Texas
Laughing girl: So I was smelling his dirty socks and stuff…
Friends: What?!
Acadia University
Wolfville, Nova Scotia
Canadia
Overheard by: wondering why…
Woman, dropping friend off at airport, then heading to doctor's office: Enjoy your two weeks in France.
Friend: Thanks, enjoy your colonoscopy.
Airport
Ithaca, New York
Bird man: Well, you know, some kids’ll pay 12-hundred dollars a month to live in some tiny room in a tiny apartment.
Cat woman: I lived like that when I was a kid. It’s fun — just living in other people’s apartments.
Bird woman: Yeah! These days it’s more like it’s fun sleeping 20 in a bathtub.
Woodstock, New York
Frizzy-haired college girl: Are you seriously asking me to to sell myself so you can hitchhike to Sicily?
Friend #1: There are so many things wrong with that sentence.
Friend #2: Yeah. Like first of all, no one in Italy would want to pay for you.
UC Davis
Davis, California
Overheard by: Passing Student
Guy going up escalator to friend: Did you see that? That guy just tried to touch my butt.
Friend: Don't complain, he succeeded in touching mine!
Washington, DC
Woman: Sleeping with him just never feels consensual. It’s like being raped by your brother.
Friend: Yeah, it felt like that for me, too.
http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/03/two-separate-conversations-at-stop-shop.html
Man #1: How’s your wife?
Man #2: How should I know?
Man #1: What do you mean: “How should I know?”? She’s your wife! Don’t you talk to her?
Man #2: Not since she got the restraining order on me.
Huxley, Iowa
Overheard by: Hondo
