Midshipman: It's midgets, sir.
Skeptical lieutenant: Is it like albino midgets or something?
Midshipman: No, sir, regular midgets.
Skeptical lieutenant: Oh well…okay, then.
NROTC Classroom
Atlanta, Georgia
Midshipman: It's midgets, sir.
Skeptical lieutenant: Is it like albino midgets or something?
Midshipman: No, sir, regular midgets.
Skeptical lieutenant: Oh well…okay, then.
NROTC Classroom
Atlanta, Georgia
Flight attendant: Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard flight 1751 to Raleigh-Durham. My name is John and I am your head flight attendant today. I will be assisted by my lovely fiancee Sarah and my ex-wife Jill. It may be a little awkward but we hope you have a pleasant flight.
Runway
Atlanta, Georgia
Bitchy student: So, are you still married?
Innocent victim: Yeah. Yeah I am!
Bitchy student: Uh huh. And just how long do you think that will last??
Kennesaw State University
Georgia
Girl to friends: I've got visions of blowjobs dancing in my head!
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Holly
Decked-out tarot card reader, eyes closed, acting all mystical: I'm getting the feeling of a friend, a female presence that seems to be around you quite often. I get this feeling, this strong feeling, that she tries to help you in certain ways but her help isn't the good kind. For some reason, a phrase keeps popping in my head. This one phrase.
Drunk seated hipster girl: What is it?
Tarot card reader: The words (dramatic pause) “party too hard.”
Alcove Gallery
Atlanta, Georgia
Mom with two kids getting on escalator: Tommy, do you know what this is called? This is an escalator.
Tommy: Escalator.
Mom: Do you know what the opposite of “escalate” is?
(Tommy remains silent)
Mom: Elevate!
Airport
Atlanta, Georgia
High girl #1: I mean, they can't arrest me for walking around in a gorilla suit, can they?
High girl #2: No, dude, I don't think so.
Georgia College & State University
Hyperactive four-year-old: I want ice cream! I want ice cream!
Frumpy mother: Go away, my hair is going to fall all over you.
Hyperactive four-year-old: I don't care! I want ice cream! I'm taking your purse!
Frumpy mother: Ryan, if you touch my purse, I'm spanking you! Now go away, you're annoying me!
Hyperactive four-year-old: No, I'm not, are you kidding me?
Frumpy mother (mumbling): You little rodent.
Hyperactive four-year-old: I am not!
Hair Salon
Cumming, Georgira
Overheard by: Caylin
Crying girl to boyfriend: But I love you! You love me!
Boyfriend: Listen very carefully to me. I fucked her. You shouldn't have been a bitch to me about your friends. Now you can get over this and stop being a bitch and we can go get dinner and ice cream and then go home and fuck like sexy little drunk bunnies, or you can keep it up and find yourself without a boyfriend. Your call. Move on and be in love with me, or be a bitch and get dumped.
Girlfriend, still crying: I'm sorry.
Boyfriend: I know. It's okay.
Atlanta, Georgia
