Guys

Guy: We could have been run over by trucks or seagulls.

Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York

Overheard by: Nik

Guy: It was mostly about fucking goats, but I also learned a lot about libel law.

Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Nick

Man gassing up his pickup truck to screaming woman inside: Goddammit, Delores, I cannot unfuck that woman!

Gas Station, Alabama

Man to another in restroom stall: Let go of my ears; I know what I’m doing!

Nightclub, Oxford Street
Darlinghurst, Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: Claudia Rose

Guy #1: Hey, cool! Harry Potter bookmarks! You think they have one for Hufflepuff?
Guy #2: Probably not.
Guy #1: Oh… Do you think it’s because nobody cares?

Borders
Tucson, Arizona

Dude #1: Hey, man, you okay?
Dude #2: Yeah, I was just in that… hot… shit… What’s that called?
Dude #1: The sauna?
Dude #2: Yeah. That shit is hot, man.

Rec center
Gilbert, Arizona

Male student to girlfriend: Your body is uneven!

George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia

Girlfriend on packed, stopped train: I'm bored. Tell me a story.
Boyfriend: I remember the first time I saw you…you were crying…sitting outside the abortion clinic. I gave you my hankie.

Yellow Train
Washington, DC

Overheard by: entertained next to them

Guy #1, walking into beer garden: What does “drunk in public” mean exactly?
Guy #2: I think it's kind of self-explanatory.

Columbia, Missouri

Guy: Man, look at this guy! It's weird how they keep the eyelashes and hair on to keep them semi-human. You can see everything!
Girl: Um, are all penises so big?
Guy: I think it's due to preserving process.
Girl: I'm hungy.

Body Worlds Exhibit
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: 8lb Gem my ASS!!