Happiness

Hyperactive camper: Oh, boy, my favorite — milk and cookies and pills!

Overnight camp
Wolfeboro, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Counselor Lou

Teen comic book geek #1: It's a good thing you're not a figment of my imagination. That would just be awkward.
Teen comic book geek #2: Yeah, totally.

Bookman's
Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: adult comic book geek

Tayal tribesman bus driver: Sir, do you want to get off at this stop?
Old man: Yes, I want off at this stop, I am going to the dentist's.
Bus driver: What's wrong?
Old man: I have to have a tooth pulled. Can you believe that? I'm 82 but I still have to have a tooth pulled.
Bus driver: If you're going to have one pulled, you may as well have a bunch taken out.
Old man: That won't do, false teeth are expensive.
Bus driver: Then have boar tusks put in.
Old man: Boar tusks?
Bus driver (very earnestly): Yes, you can have two tusks put in on the lower jaw, and when they grow, they'll look great! (uses his fingers to demonstrate how the tusks would look growing out of his mouth)
Old man (laughing): It would take a long time for them to grow.
Bus driver: Not long! You're an old boar, but I'm just a young boar, so yours would grow much faster than mine!
(old man gets off bus laughing cheerfully)

http://talovich.blogspot.com/2008_08_01_archive.html#4067720002953022860

Overheard by: Yugan Dali

Passenger to attendant: Excuse me? They turned the movie off.
Attendant: Yes, we're landing earlier than thought.
Passenger: Oh, but the movie wasn't over.
Attendant: Sorry about that, but we need to turn it off for descent.
Passenger: But I was watching it!
Attendant: I am very sorry, but since we have started our descent…
Passenger, interrupting: But now I don't know how it ends!
Attendant: They all lived happily ever after.

Qantas Flight to Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Seat 14 F

Happy little boy touching everything: Bacteria! Bacteria! Bacteria!

Post Office
Hammond, Louisiana

Very pregnant woman surrounded by misbehaving children: Pregnancy is just such a gift. I mean, I feel so blessed. Like, this is what my body was made for, you know? I just feel so much more complete when I'm pregnant. Knowing that I'm growing this life…
Young woman behind her in line, interrupting: Madam? You are a walking advertisement for mandatory birth control.

Starbucks
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: The guy applauding her

Loud 50-something woman, happy and upbeat: I'm just sad. And lonely!

Lafayette, Louisiana

Happy dad to little kid: Capital punishment is fun!

Morgantown, West Virginia

Girl passing two students eating: They have corn!

JC Bistro, George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia

Overheard by: Candice

Girl #1: Oh my god, I'm so glad Sammy didn't come tonight.
Girl #2: I'm Sammy.

Women's Bathroom
Adelaide
Australia

Overheard by: I was in a cubicle. Oh, to have seen their faces.