Jesus: The One Guy Whose Shit Didn’t Stink

High chick spotting dirty hippie: Oooh! He’s cute!
Drunk chick: No, he’s dirty!
High chick: He looks like Jesus!
Sober chick: He might look like Jesus, but he smells like shit!

Arizona

Overheard by: Designated Driver

Posted on January 25, 2022
Arizona, Chicks, Insults

You’ll Pay, Like All the Others, When My Time Machine Is Complete

Five-year-old son: I am going to see the Reds yesterday with Mom.
Father: You mean tomorrow?
Five-year-old son: No, yesterday.
Father, puzzled: I think you mean tomorrow, buddy.
Five-year-old son, frustrated: Ugh! You’re a pea-brain, Dad!

Cincinnati, Ohio

Overheard by: teachinghimthewrongthings

Posted on December 27, 2021
Dads, Insults, Kids, Ohio, Words

You Keep Bringing Them Home for Me

Muscle gal: You are such a fuckin’ pussy.
Muscle guy: Fuck that, I could take a seven-foot black man.
Muscle gal: Awww, I know.

West County YMCA
St. Louis, Missouri

Posted on December 20, 2021
Bragging, Gym rats, Insults, Missouri, YMCA

Meet the Hippest Kids in Montana

Tall adolescent: Peach sucks. Daisy's okay, but peach sucks.
Short adolescent: See, I've always been more of a toad fan. Even if he does look kind of like a circumcised wang.
Tall adolescent: Oh, you.

Missoula, Montana

Posted on December 19, 2021
Compare and contrast, Default, Games, Insults, Montana, Penis, Pop culture, Teens

It's on My Google Calendar!

Girl #1: Ew! Are you gonna ask her tonight? You gonna ask her?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Why she has a huge fucking bush!
Girl #2: Oh, for sure!

McGill University
Montreal
Canadia

Posted on November 10, 2021
Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Girls, Insults, Questions, Vagina

Thanks So Much, You Obese Cocksucker! Love Ya!

Teenage girl to friend: You're pretty fucked up too. (pause) No, I mean in a positive way!

Melbourne
Australia

Posted on October 17, 2021
Australia, Insults, Teens, Weirdness

Don't All Women Talk Shit Behind Your Back?

Asian guy #1: She's the kind of woman who stands to the side, but she's also the kind of woman who talks shit behind your back.
Asian guy #2: Yeah, traditional Asian bitch.

UCSD
San Diego, California

Posted on October 8, 2021
Asians, California, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Geography, Guys, Insults

How Most of Us Feel About Seventh Heaven

Boi lesbian talking to shorter boi lesbian: Those motherfuckers are sweet as shit. Those bitches make me sick.

Tacoma, Washington

Overheard by: Maybe she likes them to be mean?

Posted on October 7, 2021
Default, Insults, Lesbos, Sexuality, Washington

I Hate When They Do It While You're Driving, and You Can't See the Road

Frustrated gamer playing The Legend of Zelda: Did you see that? She's such a slut! Her vagina was just totally up in link's face. And he's like, twelve. Why are women like that all the time?

University of Massachusetts

Overheard by: the girl in the corner cramming for finals

Posted on September 14, 2021
Age and ageing, Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Guys, Insults, Massachusetts, Questions, Vagina

And You Could Actually Sing

Guy to girl: You know, Mandy Moore made a bad decision going brunette. Now she looks like you, if you were a crack whore.

Oberlin College
Oberlin, Ohio

Overheard by: emily

Posted on September 8, 2021
About celebrities, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, Hair, Insults, Ohio

Insults