Kids

Teacher reading story to class: Little Bear hurt his head, and Big Bear kissed it better. Little Bear hurt his foot, and Big Bear kissed it better…
Six-year-old: Well, shit happens.

Sydney
Australia

Six-year-old boy: I French-kissed my girlfriend today!
17-year-old girl: What? French kissed? You're six!
Six-year-old boy: I still did it. She gave me her brush!
17-year-old girl: You're six! You shouldn't know what French kissing is!
Six-year-old boy: I watch Family Guy.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Mia

20-something chick on cell: How do five-year-olds even know about jello enemas?

Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Pookins

Little girl: Mom, can I buy that doll house?
Mom: No, you don't have enough money.
Daughter: Can't I just use my college money?
Mom: No.
Daughter: But I don't want to go to college, I want the doll house! I don't want to go to college!

Toy Store
Canadia

Man in line for character photos: Crap, I just took a picture of someone else's kids, I'm not a pedophile, don't start thinking that!

Disney World
Florida

Overheard by: Chelsea

Woman to son: That's the dress Larry Bird Johnson wore to the inauguration.

First Ladies Exhibit, Smithsonian
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Dave White

Four-year-old in shopping cart: Yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda! (repeated over and over)
Mom: Stop that! Stop saying that!
Four-year-old: (continues)
Mom: You don't even know what that means! Just because you don't know what something means doesn't mean you can just repeat it like that. (turns to man behind her in line) I don't know where he gets this stuff.
Four-year-old: I heard it from you, crazy!

Columbus, Ohio

Overheard by: Lindsay

Small boy: It’s fire!
His mother: That is your umbrella. It is not a sword or weapon of any kind.
Small boy: It’s underpants!

Trolley
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Ten-year old girl #1: He was pretty cute.
Ten-year old girl #2: I know! I had the biggest crush on him in third grade… until he died.

Santa Fe, New Mexico

Overheard by: Wait. What?

Little girl looking at display of puffed wheat snacks: What’s the difference between puffed and fried?
Mom: Puffed is better for you, so you can eat more of them.
Little girl: But I don’t like puffed.
Dad: Puffed is gay.

Crossroads Market
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Laura