Big black woman acting as bathroom attendant: Welcome, beautiful ladies, to the best urination station in the nation! A big pee at the Big E! Stall 5 is open! Okay, we've got a full house, so I wanna hear some flushin'! Ma'am, go to numba 2, let it flow through! Pee as comfortably as you can, cause we all know this place was built by a man! The stalls are too small, haha!
Bathroom, Big E Fairgrounds
Springfield, Massachusetts
Girl: Sorry about the chafing. My butt still hurts when I poo.
Boy: [Makes sad face.]Girl: From your surprise. I don’t like your surprises.
Boy: It surprised me too!
Boston, Massachusetts
Gay goth kid: Diana Ross, what are you doing in my mouth?
Dunkin Donuts
Worcester, Massachusetts
Overheard by: hootinanny
Chick: So like three weeks ago, after I gave birth, we went to this club…
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Passerby, to himself: Man, they should totally make Google a wonder of the world. I mean, they already have Hollywood and shit.
Technology Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rachael Johnson
Girl to friends, emphatically: No, we have nipples so that we can milk our children!
Newton, Massachusetts
Cop, over cruiser speaker, to lethargic group of hipsters: Go ahead…walk.
(hipsters saunter across street)
Cop, still on speaker: Good job.
Davis Square
Somerville, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kaitlin
Hardhat telling story in falsetto voice: Leave me alone! I have a million things on my mind! [Switching to own voice] I’m like, ‘We haven’t had sex in weeks!’
Boston, Massachusetts
Guy with sunglasses on cell: So I went back to the apartment today and he was passed out again! (pause) Yeah, dude, I think he smoked a bowl on my bed and then seized a few times…
B Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Black teen employee to teen girl employee: Some of these people, they want to get to know you and make a connection, and I'm like, “man, I don't want to be your friend, I just want to give you a towel.”
Marino Center
Boston, Massachusetts
