Names

Guy: She's pregnant? Isn't she like 16?
Chick: So?
Guy: That's so ghetto!
Chick: So what? Every pregnant 16-year-old is some ghetto welfare mama? For all you know she could be a great mom! You're too fucking judgmental!
Guy: (stunned silence)
Chick: Anyway, she found out it's a girl last week. She's naming her “Sequins.”

Toronto
Canadia

Girl #1: I love how every time I make a scenario where I'm around Stephen I scream in his face and force him to be sexual with me. Except for that time I rubbed against him in a non-sexual way to cure any illnesses I have.
Girl #2: There was that time you stabbed him in the thigh too.
Girl #1: Really? Why did I do that?
Girl #2: You just wanted to know his dog's name and if he likes pita bread.
Girl #1: Ohhh…yeah.

Asheville, North Carolina

Overheard by: Amanda

Guy to girl: So you heard about Dave, right? His girlfriend broke up with him last night. He got completely wasted and tried to kill himself by drinking a bottle of shampoo.
Girl: Oh my god! Is he okay?
Guy: Yeah, turns out you cant kill yourself by drinking shampoo. We're calling him “bubbles” now. He'll never live this down.

Lockport, New York

Overheard by: evan

Older lady customer: Are you Chris?
Manager guy: No, I'm Mike.
Older lady customer: Are you Carl?
Manager guy: No, I'm still Mike.

Perkins Restaurant
Westfall, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Veronica @ http://everythingisused.blogspot.com/

Woman in cell phone store: I want to change the billing name on this account.
Employee: I'm sorry, we can't allow you to make changes on this account. You're not the primary account-holder.
Woman: Right. The primary account holder died.
Employee: I'm sorry, only the primary account-holder can make changes to the account.
Woman: He's dead!

Verizon Store
Grand Rapids, Michigan

Girl #1: I don't know, I mean…he's not the best looking.
Girl #2: Yeah, but neither is she. I mean, she can be…
Girl #1: Yeah, I mean, he's not really good looking, and she's not pretty-pretty, y'know?
Girl #2: I guess. I mean, I guess they fit together. What's her name anyway?
Girl #1: I don't know, “r” something.

http://overheardatlc.blogspot.com

Overheard by:

Random freshman: And then this junior girl came up to me and was like, “look at this penis on my locker…his name is Napoleon.”

Lakeland Regional High School
Wanaque, New Jersey

Overheard by: kristina

Bible thumper pointing at chick: You're the master baiter!

University Quad
Illinois State

Overheard by: a fellow masterbater

Explosive, neurotic 20-something to friend: Say your prayers, mantis pants!

Vancouver, BC
Canadia

Little boy (jumping off fire truck on a giant spring): Let's go to wienerland!

Miami, Florida