Overheard in Minneapolis

Three-year-old boy (enthusiastically): When I get home, I’m going to shoot someone!
Sunday school teacher: I don’t think you should do that.
Three-year-old boy: With a squirt gun!
Sunday school teacher: Oh, good.
Three-year-old boy: And a machine gun!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/304115855/some-problems-require-a-machine-gun.html

Overheard by: wayzata

Three-year-old boy to mom, noticing police officers nearby: Don't do anything bad while you're here. Okay, mom?
Mom: Okay.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/319181011/its-going-to-be-hard.html

Overheard by: an amused barista.

Drunk girl: So, I wrote a folk song about Christopher Reeves. Post-paralysis, pre-death. So, it's not quite as depressing. Wanna hear it?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/417247759/sign-me-up-2.html

Overheard by: uhhh yes

Young woman on cell: Who is this? (pause) He is my baby, not my boyfriend! I told you that. (short pause) What's wrong with you?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/343960110/that-probably-cant-be-summed-up-in-a-phone-call.html

Overheard by: yikes!

Drunk guy to drunk date: So wait, you want us to be in an anonymous relationship?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/367412832/hiding-it-from-others-or-from-themselves.html

Overheard by: justarrivedtothebarsober

Young man to two female friends: If we go on that ride and his underwear aren't wet at the end, I am making him trade me.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/378462613/thats-a-pretty-bum-deal-for-other-guy.html

Overheard by: it's a deal!

Eight-year-old boy: So, is the birthday party going to be fun?
Six-year-old girl: Yeah!
Eight-year-old boy: Who knows? It could be a disaster!

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/441497736/is-it-too-late-to-uninvite-her.html

Overheard by: working hard to make it a fun party.

Middle-aged African American bus driver: So what if she is? I wear heels and I'm 5′8″. I wear them to church.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger: Oh, but at least at church you're sitting down.
Middle-aged African American bus driver: Oh no, honey. I'm up singing and dancing. I go to a black church. We get our praise on.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger (after uncomfortable pause): That sounds fun.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/370559900/enthusiasm-is-scary.html

Overheard by: yes it does

20-something man: Oh, man, we've got a really full day tomorrow. We have to freeze all that tomato sauce we made.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/399234131/manually.html

Overheard by: Jon

Man to friend: I don’t know which is worse, the fact that she wanted a present for Valentine’s Day and I didn’t get her one, or the fact that I didn’t want a present for my birthday and she got me one.

http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/04/hes_a_keeper.html

Overheard by: you really don’t know?