Because That's What My Therapist Said

20-something guy, browsing toys: So… Do I have a penis face?

Edinburgh
Scotland

Overheard by: Lena

Little Tommy Lee Had Quite the Ego.

Seven-year-old in underwear in dressing room, doing pelvis thrusts: Look at my horse! My horse is amazing!

Target
Ithaca, New York

Teen girl, holding candy bar: Why does it have to be so big? I can't take all this. (pause) That's what I said!

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

30-something dude: I didn't circumcise my son.
20-something dude #1: Are you circumcised?
20-something dude #2: Woah!

Cincinnati, Ohio

White Russian guy with slight accent: Something tells me my first born won't be white. That something is my penis.

Austin, Texas

Overheard by: The Sauce

Three-year-old boy: When I get older my penis is going to get so big, and then it will talk to me.

Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Dr Banana Grabber

Physiotherapist: I have a small wife, so a small penis is okay.

Ontario
Canadia

Pregnant mother to son: Stop throwing daddy's meat around!

Outback Steakhouse
Parsippany, New Jersey

Drunk dude to girl: You will get absolutely no penis in your life! None!

Transit Train
New Jersey

Overheard by: Russ

Woman #1: Look at that rainbow outside!! It's huge!
Woman #2: I know! It's like when you see a black dick for the first time.

Turlock, California