Drunk girl: I think… If I didn't have a family I would be a porn star.
Saint Joseph's University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Drunk girl: I think… If I didn't have a family I would be a porn star.
Saint Joseph's University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Adorable eight-year-old girl: I would do anything for a bagel… except shoot someone.
Ardmore, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: was a hungry 8 yr old once too
Girl to friends: So, when I was 6, I took my golden retriever's rectal temperature with a tire pressure gauge.
Nice Restaurant
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Sorostitute, about bender: So what time does it start?
Frat boy: I've set my alarm for 9 am. We'll start then. We've got two kegs in and two cases of tequila.
Sorostitute: I'm such a lightweight. I'll probably be passed out by 11. My roommate said “please don't die. If you die, call me.”
Penn State University
Kid-faced guy in suit on cell: Yeah, and then those malicious evildoers told me I shouldn't be there. (pause) They were the minions of the Antichrist. (pause) I'm serious, dammit!
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Carrie
Girl #1, listening to John Denver: This is a great song. Especially if you're gay. You should have this at your wedding.
Girl #2: Well, if I marry a gay guy, it'll be great.
Phildelphia, Pennsylvania
Heavily tattooed man: She got this new haircut; it's short, but it's kind of… awkward.
Heavily tattooed woman: Like a bowl cut?
Heavily tattooed man: No, kind of like… What's-his-name, from Scooby Doo.
Heavily tattooed woman: Velma?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: jira monkey
Teen girl, holding candy bar: Why does it have to be so big? I can't take all this. (pause) That's what I said!
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Screaming woman, surrounded by children: I haven't breast fed in months! Why won't they leave me alone?!
Philadelphia Zoo
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: mammophile
Professor, in monotone voice: I think we're all familiar with merry-go-rounds. They're objects in playgrounds that rotate at relatively high speeds, and we put our children on them.
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Tyler G
