Preppies

Preppy guy #1: “Pangaea,” like the continent?
Preppy guy #2: Yeah, my sister just had a face lift.

Wal-Mart
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Rev Loon

Preppy chick: I didn't see you in class today. Where were you?
Guy: I was having sex in the bathroom.
Preppy chick: Oh, I want to try that.

Florida

Really preppy girl to preppy friends: Like, Jesus had problems too!

Ithaca, New York

Overheard by: Ananda

Guy: Do you spit or swallow?
Preppy girl: I don’t know. I just chew.

Florida

Homeless woman to preppy kid in pink shirt: Don’t mix your reds and your whites!

Boulder, Colorado

Preppy girl: I love not wearing pants.
[Friends start to laugh.]Preppy girl: No! I mean have you ever gone to the beach and –you just take off your bottoms and –no! I mean you like take off your swimsuit bottoms–.
[Friends erupt in laughter.]Preppy girl: I just mean –I just like not wearing pants…

High School
San Diego, California

Preppy brunette on cell: So did you hear? Hillary won the primaries yesterday! [Pause.] Wait, you mean there’s more than one?

JMU Bookstore
Harrisonburg, Virginia

Overheard by: baffled

Preppie guy: … And I said, “That’s why I trade corn futures!” [Entire table erupts in raucous laughter.]

Ethiopian restaurant, 12th & U
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Ladle

Preppy girl on cell: the longest amount of time I’ve had pubic hair is three days.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: kt

Preppy girl #1: Wow, now we all have the same necklace! We should all wear them the next time we go out!
Preppy girl #2: Yeah! We’d be like the Power Rangers or something!
Preppy girl #3: Or we’d be like douchebags.

Eastern Market
Washington, DC

Overheard by: office peon does d.c.