Preppy brunette on cell: So did you hear? Hillary won the primaries yesterday! [Pause.] Wait, you mean there’s more than one?
JMU Bookstore
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: baffled
Preppy brunette on cell: So did you hear? Hillary won the primaries yesterday! [Pause.] Wait, you mean there’s more than one?
JMU Bookstore
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: baffled
Little boy: I don’t have a grandma!
Grandma: Yes you do sweetie…
Little boy: No! I don’t have a grandma!
Grandma: Yes you do…
Little boy: No, you’re a giant!
Grocery Store
Colorado
Overheard by: Not a Giant or a Grandma
Mother to ten-year-old son at supermarket check-out queue: And then we’ll go and look for a dress for me.
Ten-year-old son: I’m not going clothes shopping with you. You go in every shop, you try everything on, you never like anything and come home with nothing and I’m not standing around waiting!
[All male members of the queue cheer.]
Luton
England
Six-year-old girl, gyrating hips: Mommy! Mommy! This is how babies are made!
Mother: That’s nice.
Gap Store, Stanford Shopping Center
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: this is why I don’t shop at the gap
Grocery store clerk: Did you find everything you were looking for today?
Customer: Yep.
Clerk: Oh good. The last woman said she didn’t, and I had no idea what to say. So I just looked at her and kind of shrugged my shoulders. She got so mad.
Customer: Then why do you ask?
Clerk: To be polite.
HyVee
Fort Dodge, Iowa
Six-year-old kid: Will you come over to our place?
Mom’s friend: No.
Six-year-old kid: Why not?
Mom’s friend: Because you’re annoying.
Mom: See? I told you!
Fabric Store
DeKalb, Illinois
Angry father, to young daughter: Do you wanna go to Chuck E. Cheese?
Daughter: [scared silence]Father: Then stop touching shit!
Wal-Mart
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Molly BOOM
Six-year-old girl to six-year old boy: Do you want to get a coffee?
Barnes & Noble
Plainfield, Illinois
Overheard by: Tdcompton
Meathead to another: Dude, are you in a relationship? ‘Cause if you’re not in a relationship, you don’t have to call her ever. Do you hear me? Ever!
Safeway
Ellensburg, Washington
Husband to wife showing him Greek Bible: Honey, if English is good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me.
Barnes & Noble
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: aharon
