Can't We Just, Like, Phone It In?

College boy #1: Like what does that mean? I don't go to class! Do you go to class?
College boys #2 and #3: No!

Emory University
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: On my way to class

Posted on June 2, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Georgia, Guys, Questions, Students

The Feather Boas Are Confusing

English teacher: Going around is a sheet with some 1920s slang, so you can get used to it before we start reading The Great Gatsby. Okay, so, everyone knows what a flapper is…?
Tenth grader: Oh, like a transvestite, right?

Tinton Falls, New Jersey

Posted on June 2, 2009
Books, Compare and contrast, Default, New Jersey, Questions, Students, Teachers, Words

Your Editors Are Unaccountably Aroused

Girl in restroom #1: I just found an eyelash in my bellybutton!
Girl in restroom #2: Is it yours?
Girl in restroom #1: Yeah…I think.

Auburn University Student Union
Auburn, Alabama

Posted on May 29, 2009
Alabama, Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Questions, Restroom, Students, Weirdness

I'm Afraid It's Just Cold Cuts for the Dead

Teacher: Where does the friar discover the bloodstains in the tomb?
Student #1: In the kitchen!
Teacher: There's no kitchen in a tomb.
Student #2: Well, dead people got to eat too!
Student #3: No they don't, stupid!
Student #4: Wait, don't people get hungry when they die?

9th Grade English Class
Louisiana

Overheard by: Is it Summer Vacation Yet?

Posted on May 27, 2009
Death & dying, Default, Louisiana, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Stupidity, Teachers

But, Like, Why Do They Always Salivate When I Ring This Bell?

Professor: How do you feel about presenting?
Student: Nervous. I don't like talking in front of people.
Professor: These aren't people, these are students!
Students: (silence)
Professor: That's not a nice thing to say. You can't believe I just said that, can you?

UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts

Overheard by: CR

Posted on May 14, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Feelings, Massachusetts, Questions, Students, Teachers

With a Little Cinnamon and Some Splenda. What?

Nursing student #1, about absent classmate: If she'd have kept her fucking mouth shut and not been a motherfucking snitch we wouldn't be in this mess!
Nursing student #2: Why'd she snitch on us?
Nursing student #1: I don't know, but she think she the best thing since apple sauce!
(long pause)
Nursing student #1: I really like applesauce!

Marian College
Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on May 12, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Indiana, Insults, Mouth, Nurses, Questions, Students

This Isn't Wellesley

Prospective student's mother: I hear there are a lot of lesbians on this campus.
Student tour guide: Well, it isn't like they jump out of the bushes and convert you or anything.

College, Colorado

Posted on May 11, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Gossip, Moms, Sexuality, Students, Women

Then You Hunker Down in the Library and Study for Finals

Male student in campus center: So once you put on the wetsuit, you pee all over yourself. Then you're warm for the whole time!

Princeton University
New Jersey

Overheard by: excuse me?

Posted on May 11, 2009
Advice, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Guys, New Jersey, Pee, Students

…in My Socks!

College girl: And spectacularly, there is cheese.

Denver, Colorado

Posted on May 10, 2009
Colorado, Compare and contrast, Default, Food, Girls, Students, Words

She's the Best Boss Ever

Ditzy female student #1: How cute is it that she can bend all the way over with her elbows on the floor?
Ditzy female student #2: I know! Do you think she'll teach us how to do it?
Ditzy female student #1: Yeah! And then we can get someone to take a photo!

Murdoch University
Perth
Australia

Posted on May 9, 2009
Australia, Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Default, Gadgets, Girls, Questions, Students, Weirdness