Professor to 20-something assistants, about sighting them at a bar: So, I thought I saw you the other night, but I wasn't sure because I thought that all you do is type.
UC Merced
Merced, California
Overheard by: Seriously?
Professor to 20-something assistants, about sighting them at a bar: So, I thought I saw you the other night, but I wasn't sure because I thought that all you do is type.
UC Merced
Merced, California
Overheard by: Seriously?
Professor: So what happened in Germany between 1928 and 1930?
Student: 1929!
Fordham University, New York
Overheard by: Sromeo
Gay professor: Yeah, so running through these questions should go a little more smoothly this time around. I looked around for what was causing it to go so slow last time, and I realized that there are disadvantages to letting your 14-year-old take your laptop to Tahoe for the weekend. I mean, really–how much lesbian porn can three teenage boys download? (class laughs) So, uh. If anything pops up, you know who to blame. I mean, it certainly isn't my secret fetish.
San Francisco State University, California
Overheard by: It isn't mine, either.
Chemistry professor: A good chemist feels what his molecules are going through. A good chemist can relate to his molecules.
Macalester College
St Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: Mac
Six-year-old child to teacher, upon seeing her new haircut for the first time: What's wrong with your hair?
Teacher: What do you mean “what's wrong with my hair”?
Child (with eyes downcast): It just looks so beautiful.
Teacher: Well, thank you.
New Westminster
BC
Canadia
Older male professor, addressing a large lecture hall with only girls: So you see, in my body you will find lots of regular cells, and also you will find cells that are in the process of meiosis; and those are my sperm cells.
Barnard girl: That is so awkward.
Barnard College
New York
Overheard by: Vicksburg
Professor: If you walk into a dark room, you're not going to just step on a cat laying in the middle of the floor.
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Brittany
Prof: Let's get down to the meat and bolts of it.
Chestnut Hill College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvaia
Professor: It's like pouring milk on the floor and putting your baby in it. Not as efficient as a nipple.
University of Vermont
History professor: The Irish love country music. When you're there, you expect to hear bagpipes playing, but then you walk into a bar and it's all, “you've been flushed from the bathroom of my heart!”
Northern Kentucky University
Overheard by: Dohiyi
