Blonde: There was a Ken doll encased in jello in the fridge.
Pocket Sandwich Theater
Dallas, Texas
Blonde: There was a Ken doll encased in jello in the fridge.
Pocket Sandwich Theater
Dallas, Texas
Girl: It’s not like you can wake up and be like ‘Hm. I want to be a girl today,’ and then put on your girl parts!
Guy: Ohhh… It’s not?
Auditorium Shores
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Ellison’s Orange
Girl: So, what's the test going to be like?
Professor: Hard… No, I don't know. I've never done this before.
College Station, Texas
Professor: Some people’s minds are so open that their brains fall out.
University of St. Thomas
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: AnnArrogance
Really skinny sorority girl: I paid my rent and then I spent the rest, $700, on this new Louis Vuitton (squeals and hugs the purse). But now I have 30 bucks to last a whole month. Looks like I'll be dating for dinner or eating crackers.
Sorority friend: You spent twice as much on your bag as you did your rent! At least you paid your rent on time! Don't worry, you'll find dates. That purse is totally worth it!
Really skinny sorority girl: I know, right, I should just live in my purse. I think that is why married women get fat: they can finally afford to eat. You know my ass is getting fat when I get married.
IHOP
Dallas, Texas
Teacher: I got a question for you guys… If you're flying at 50,000 feet and the left rear tire falls off your canoe, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse and why?
Students: What the fuck?
Teacher: Clearly, the answer is 7, cause ice cream has no bones!
Student #1: Why do they keep giving us teachers on crack?
Student #2: I dunno, man. I dunno…
Inside Freshman Classroom
El Paso, Texas
Jock on cell: I bet he’s a lame fuck. He wouldn’t do any of that weird stuff you like.
Barton Springs Pool
Austin, Texas
Exasperated mom to young daughter (referring to a stuffed beaver): Quit messing with that beaver! (pause) and that's the last time I ever want to say that sentence!
Ikea
Frisco, Texas
Overheard by: Becca
