Macho dude in Student Government Association: I'll smite you with my boobs!
Cafeteria
Tunxis Community College, Connecticut
Overheard by: Girl in Black
Macho dude in Student Government Association: I'll smite you with my boobs!
Cafeteria
Tunxis Community College, Connecticut
Overheard by: Girl in Black
New male employee: You shouldn’t open the lettuce like that.
Old female employee: Don’t tell me how to do my fucking job!
Manager, yelling from across store: Watch out! She’ll cut you!
Jimmy John’s
Charleston, Illinois
Overheard by: I just want my sandwich
Six-year-old #1: I'm taking you to court!
Six-year-old #2: No you're not!
Six-year-old #1: I'm taking you to court!
Six-year-old #2: No you're not!
Six-year-old #1: You're in court!
Six-year-old #2: No I'm not!
Six-year-old #1: You're in court now!
Six-year-old #2: (begins to cry)
Small Town
Maine
Overheard by: Willem Rosenthal
English professor: Outer space is occupied by evil orientals.
Marymount University
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Sarah Yvonne
Mom to little girl touching display: Honey, don’t do that! [Kid keeps doing it.] I said don’t do that! Do you want to go to Hell?
Little girl, scared: No.
Mom: Then don’t touch that.
Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: the girl behind the register
Wife: This is the last chance. I’m really going to file for divorce unless you’re willing to work at this.
Husband: I deserve someone that I won’t cheat on.
Omaha, Nebraska
Male professor, in a very girly voice: Aaaahhh! I'm being trampled by sea horses.
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Guy at ID counter: I’m sorry. Don’t shoot the messenger.
Old lady: I’d rather shoot the police…
http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com/2006/10/uhhh.html
Overheard by: tom
[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
Belligerent hobo: Hey, you! Get back here! Open up that bathroom door! Get back here, or I’ll pull out my 401(k) on you!
418 East 34th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
