Violence

Girl, bitching to friend: She was scratching my piano! I wanted to throw her down the stairs!

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: Soko

Red-headed woman: I wish they’d take this place and just plunk it down in New York so I could shove people.
Red-headed guy: Word!

National Museum of Natural History
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Nujju

Diminutive Asian girl: Well, I think that…
English professor: Isn’t “Balls!” such a great expression? It’s just so… you know… I give you all permission to interject and interrupt this class by shouting “Balls!” at any time for the rest of the year. Sorry, go ahead with your comment.
Diminutive Asian girl: Well, I think that…
English professor: Balls!

www.overheardatyale.com

Overheard by: overheardatyale

Black woman #1: I hate when people wait to the last minute to try and get off at a stop.
Black woman #2: Mmm-hmm.
Black woman #1: I don't let them past if they try to do that shit.
Black woman #2: What you do?
Black woman #1: I'll push their mothafuckin' ass back on the train!

Subway
New York City

Professor walking through the hall: Well I guess I’d have to be spanked then.
Asian grad student: That’s why they’re called “accidents”!

University of Illinois

Middle aged man on phone: Maraud my castle?

Bath
England

Overheard by: Clara Lee

Serious hipster chick #1: So she shot him in the leg, because that was her training.
Serious hipster chick #2 (nodding understandingly): Uh-huh.
Serious hipster chick #1: And then they ended up lying feet to feet.

Art Opening
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Terry B

Priest: Their first love has brought them so many tears and grief… and black eyes. But they will love again!

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Woman, paying for breakfast: I had to beat up my son for this five dollars.

Deli Counter
Bethesda, Maryland

Overheard by: Minivet

Four-year-old boy, wielding plastic sword and shield: It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, it's a sword.
Four-year-old boy: No! It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, no, no, Danny. Knives are for cutting. Swords are for vanquishing.

99 B-Line
Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: Frodo Baggins