Violence

Serious hipster chick #1: So she shot him in the leg, because that was her training.
Serious hipster chick #2 (nodding understandingly): Uh-huh.
Serious hipster chick #1: And then they ended up lying feet to feet.

Art Opening
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Terry B

Priest: Their first love has brought them so many tears and grief… and black eyes. But they will love again!

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Woman, paying for breakfast: I had to beat up my son for this five dollars.

Deli Counter
Bethesda, Maryland

Overheard by: Minivet

Four-year-old boy, wielding plastic sword and shield: It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, it's a sword.
Four-year-old boy: No! It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, no, no, Danny. Knives are for cutting. Swords are for vanquishing.

99 B-Line
Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: Frodo Baggins

Very loud drunk woman: No, I don't shoot darts, but I'm good at stabbin' people!

Fairborn, Ohio

Overheard by: Monika

Serious philosophy teacher: Captain Crunch has been raped.

High School
Bethesda, Maryland

Overheard by: clementine

12-year-old: It’s my birthday! You said you would be nice to me today!
9-year-old sibling: No, I said I wouldn’t hurt you today.

Washington, Illinois

Overheard by: Laura

Girl to boyfriend: I’m sorry I stabbed you after you took me to the circus.

Denny’s
Novi, Michigan

Dude #1: Did you see the gash on his forehead?
Chick: Oh my god, there’s another fight going on!
Dude #2: Oh, look! The lunch line is short!

Glen A. Wilson High School
Hacienda Heights, California

Drunk redneck: You wanna shoot a shotgun naked? Come to my house!

The Pour House
Charleston, South Carolina

Overheard by: innocent bystander